Parent pays nearly $6,000 a month in tuition fees

[Kusje]

Nothing wrong with being medicore.

 

But the teaching we instill on the kids should be to excel in whatever u do. Not do half past six standard.

 

I'm not saying we should ask for mediocrity.

 

What I'm trying to point out is that the demand to be the best hairdresser is really no different a demand to be top in their studies. Both exert the same kind of pressure on a child who might not have the talent to meet that expectation.

 

Honestly, I cannot say what kind of parent I will be as my kid is just 1 year old now....

[Wyfitms]

I agree. When i wanted to be a GP, my family and even my wife disagreed with me.

To them, being a specialist is > than a GP.

Even nowadays, when meeting old acquaintances i get this.

I dont mind being middle or the runt of the pack

Lol u sound like a good friend of mine.

He been doing part time GP for a few years liao

Happy to work 3 day (but very long days) a week and take home a modest but still decent pay cheque

In return he gets to spend more time with family

No car stay in hdb too

[RadX]

Lol u sound like a good friend of mine.

He been doing part time GP for a few years liao

Happy to work 3 day (but very long days) a week and take home a modest but still decent pay cheque

In return he gets to spend more time with family

No car stay in hdb too

 

not the fren that we know, that one elite.........

[Jusnel]

I'm not saying we should ask for mediocrity.

 

What I'm trying to point out is that the demand to be the best hairdresser is really no different a demand to be top in their studies. Both exert the same kind of pressure on a child who might not have the talent to meet that expectation.

 

Honestly, I cannot say what kind of parent I will be as my kid is just 1 year old now....

Well, my kid is only 3 and half yrs old too.

 

I see two level of teaching that the kid should have.

 

One is choose what u want to do

Two is do the best in the choice that you chose to do.

 

In the first place, most parents don't even let the kid choose what he wants to do.

 

Like in the example of hair stylist. Nothing wrong if the kid wants to be hair stylist. But I'm sure most parents will be in shock.

 

Why shock? Let the kid be lor. But tell the kid to excel in that profession of his choice.

I agree. When i wanted to be a GP, my family and even my wife disagreed with me.

To them, being a specialist is > than a GP.

Even nowadays, when meeting old acquaintances i get this.

I dont mind being middle or the runt of the pack

Being a GP is good what. Standard working hours and have more free time.

 

Specialists life no bed of roses. Always on call and stress level up.

 

I like Dentists even more. Really standard working hours and always have good business. Probably earning more than a GP.

[Vratenza]

People tend to see being a GP as a default/fall back position for a doctor.

 

I see it as a reflection of the personality of the doctor in his choice of field of interest.

 

For eg. just imagine you put a Type A personality surgeon into a GP role to hold the hand of a depressed ah mah (literally and figuratively), while trying to manage her multiple chronic diseases and within a framework of best combination of different medications to achieve the best clinical effect at a cost that will not break her fragile piggy bank. Plus manage the time you can spare to attend to her while the queue of patients are building up outside your door. I dare say the surgeon will fail terribly even with his years of specialised training in his surgical field.

 

On the other hand, you put someone like @lala81 into the role of a surgeon (of course given all the right training in the surgical aspect), he will not do as well either. He will not be hungry enough, will not have the motivation to choose surgery over medical treatment options (given both are 50/50 choices), fore go an operation because he wants to go home for dinner with family or weekend family time.

 

As for the proctologist part...I can claim specialist in that field (just no certification)... just ask those chao geng recruits who come to me during NS claiming they have diarrhoea.....

 

 

gd on you bro!  From the time I met you, I found you to be a humble fella and glad that you have remained that and been hapy as a Family practitioner.  There is more time cf a specialist where daily, they live life on the phone

 

btw, did u even apply to go for the BST? OR your time is postings aldy?

 

that said, actually @vratenza would be a great proctologist   

 

[Wyfitms]

not the fren that we know, that one elite.........

That one similar in the sense also hardly work

But his viagra sales alone enough to make him a billionaire

[RadX]

People tend to see being a GP as a default/fall back position for a doctor.

 

I see it as a reflection of the personality of the doctor in his choice of field of interest.

 

For eg. just imagine you put a Type A personality surgeon into a GP role to hold the hand of a depressed ah mah (literally and figuratively), while trying to manage her multiple chronic diseases and within a framework of best combination of different medications to achieve the best clinical effect at a cost that will not break her fragile piggy bank. Plus manage the time you can spare to attend to her while the queue of patients are building up outside your door. I dare say the surgeon will fail terribly even with his years of specialised training in his surgical field.

 

On the other hand, you put someone like @lala81 into the role of a surgeon (of course given all the right training in the surgical aspect), he will not do as well either. He will not be hungry enough, will not have the motivation to choose surgery over medical treatment options (given both are 50/50 choices), fore go an operation because he wants to go home for dinner with family or weekend family time.

 

As for the proctologist part...I can claim specialist in that field (just no certification)... just ask those chao geng recruits who come to me during NS claiming they have diarrhoea.....

 

 

you are damn right bro.  That is why GPs are the FIRST source of holistic care to determine if there is anything wrong and looking at the trend from the EMR.  They can be sharp hv an immediate first view

 

WE under recognise the role of the GP...

 

 

but that said, i NEVER CONSULT GP for 20 yrs aldy    

That one similar in the sense also hardly work

But his viagra sales alone enough to make him a billionaire

 

paging @chowyunfatt

 

 

That one similar in the sense also hardly work

But his viagra sales alone enough to make him a billionaire

 

paging @chowyunfatt............ haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

 

 

[Lala81]

People tend to see being a GP as a default/fall back position for a doctor.

 

I see it as a reflection of the personality of the doctor in his choice of field of interest.

 

For eg. just imagine you put a Type A personality surgeon into a GP role to hold the hand of a depressed ah mah (literally and figuratively), while trying to manage her multiple chronic diseases and within a framework of best combination of different medications to achieve the best clinical effect at a cost that will not break her fragile piggy bank. Plus manage the time you can spare to attend to her while the queue of patients are building up outside your door. I dare say the surgeon will fail terribly even with his years of specialised training in his surgical field.

 

On the other hand, you put someone like @lala81 into the role of a surgeon (of course given all the right training in the surgical aspect), he will not do as well either. He will not be hungry enough, will not have the motivation to choose surgery over medical treatment options (given both are 50/50 choices), fore go an operation because he wants to go home for dinner with family or weekend family time.

 

yeah that's why always have the specialty stereotypes. I admit i can't do the Geriatrics hand holding either ...

I worked in GRM and Comm hosp before. 

 

Not that I can't do it, but it's sorta like how i don't want to wear skinny hugging jeans lol 

[Donut]

People tend to see being a GP as a default/fall back position for a doctor.

 

I see it as a reflection of the personality of the doctor in his choice of field of interest.

 

For eg. just imagine you put a Type A personality surgeon into a GP role to hold the hand of a depressed ah mah (literally and figuratively), while trying to manage her multiple chronic diseases and within a framework of best combination of different medications to achieve the best clinical effect at a cost that will not break her fragile piggy bank. Plus manage the time you can spare to attend to her while the queue of patients are building up outside your door. I dare say the surgeon will fail terribly even with his years of specialised training in his surgical field.

 

On the other hand, you put someone like @lala81 into the role of a surgeon (of course given all the right training in the surgical aspect), he will not do as well either. He will not be hungry enough, will not have the motivation to choose surgery over medical treatment options (given both are 50/50 choices), fore go an operation because he wants to go home for dinner with family or weekend family time.

 

As for the proctologist part...I can claim specialist in that field (just no certification)... just ask those chao geng recruits who come to me during NS claiming they have diarrhoea.....

U know what MOs will do to the NS boy if he claims to have diarrhoea, right? LOL

[Wind30]

do most of you have kids???

 

Frankly, most kids don't know what is good for themselves until they are maybe 16 and above.Before that, it is the responsibilities of their parents to make decisions for them I think

 

 

[Vratenza]

LOL, I cannot wear skinny jeans too.....

 

But  yeah, geriatrics is also not my preferred practice but as a GP, you will be the first line to see all the different problems from infants to gery, so being able to at least initiate management and subsequently divert the patient to the best care option is essential.

 

I realized that if the patient is genuinely sick (not gengster), an understanding listening ear works better than any medications I have in my disposal. I don't see myself as a pill pusher.

 

 

yeah that's why always have the specialty stereotypes. I admit i can't do the Geriatrics hand holding either ...

I worked in GRM and Comm hosp before. 

 

Not that I can't do it, but it's sorta like how i don't want to wear skinny hugging jeans lol 

 

[Lala81]

LOL, I cannot wear skinny jeans too.....

 

But  yeah, geriatrics is also not my preferred practice but as a GP, you will be the first line to see all the different problems from infants to gery, so being able to at least initiate management and subsequently divert the patient to the best care option is essential.

 

I realized that if the patient is genuinely sick (not gengster), an understanding listening ear works better than any medications I have in my disposal. I don't see myself as a pill pusher.

 

I'm here to dispense ... ... COMMON SENSE. 

Lol and push pills for those who love them pills 

[Wind30]

I think what is also important is that you are happy and your conscience is at peace with yourself.  No use being the sad case of Dr. Richard Teo.  Though, I'm glad that he finally found peace with himself at the end.

 

my uncle also died of lung cancer but no one reported about him... so if you are rich, you die also big news....

[Lala81]

Anyway I think sometime back there was an article about parents sending their kids to am then pm kindergarten.

Just realized one of my colleagues also does this for his 2nd child.

Edited February 17, 2017 by Lala81

[Mazda2gal]

While it may sound ludicrous, parents attending tuition is not difficult to understand and not surprising.

 

It's an awfully complex situation.

 

First of all, our nation's preoccupation with chasing (good) results. I grew up in the eighties, in a rather poor neighborhood, attended the primary school just 5mins walk away from home. I never had tuition but because of dedicated pri sch teachers, parents' encouragement and good study habits, did well in PSLE and the subsequent national exams, got my degree, got a stable job that pays reasonably well for me to afford a comfortable life. Many of my peers have similar experiences as me, our parents were not well educated, did not have resources to give us tuition nor enrichment classes but we did relatively well to get our degrees and social mobility was possible for us as a result of our 'success' in education. When people of my generation become parents, knowing the differences grades can make, they willingly devote money to support their children in learning through tuition and enrichment classes, and now parents themselves attending tuition to learn knowledge and techniques so as to help their kids 'win the race'. Can't blame them, especially when we consider my next 2 points.

 

Next, the current schooling demands on the young school children's cognitive abilities are insane. Many peers have kids in lower primary, every week they struggle to prepare their little boys and girls for English and Mother Tongue spellings. When I saw the spelling lists, I wonder why we expect our kids to memorize so much at such young age, even requiring them to do dictation of long sentences. And they are all studying in neighborhood primary schools, not some atas elite school. Once I was at a colleague's place for CNY dinner, her P1 girl brought home a Maths assignment and asked for help, all of us couldn't understand what the question was asking, eventually the girl's daddy who is working in MAS spent more than half an hour solving that one question, which apparently involved abstract conceptual thinking that is way above the cognitive ability of a P1 girl. Every time the colleague shows us her girl's tests or assignments, we'll get a shock at the kind of vocabulary the kids are supposed to read and understand. I also heard of pre-school Chinese weekly assignment being presentation on current news topic, the little kids have to talk about a recent piece of news in class, every week the parents struggle to prepare them for the presentation because the little kids just cannot do it on their own. During my time, school work was not demanding, and I had time to play and read extensively, I enjoy learning through reading even till this day. I can understand that at times we try to 'stretch' the kids' abilities but I think we're overdoing things. If even educated parents find the tasks set for young kids tough to handle, what are we trying to get the kids to learn? I don't blame our kids for not having the interest in learning. All the tuition, over-teaching and over-testing we see now probably demoralized many of them or killed their interest in learning, except for the exceptionally brilliant ones who might thrive on such challenges.

 

Third, when I was a student, school life was quite simple, just study and attend some ECAs, not a lot of other programmes, excursion was not a frequent occurrence. According to my teachers who have been teaching for decades (some even till now), they used to have time to focus on teaching-related work like lesson preparation and marking. Things have changed in schools now, with many more KPIs to meet and programs to run, so as to achieve 'holistic development', and the students get to take part in lots of programmes in school. However the teachers are stretched with the many increased demands like planning and running learning journeys and special programmes, and their time is more spent on non teaching related work leaving less time for teaching-related work. I support holistic development but it's unrealistic to expect teachers to deliver everything that's demanded of them, given limited time and energy. So the 'smarter' ones will focus on what gives the best yield in their work appraisal, and that's usually special programmes or contributions to the school. If teachers are unable to focus on teaching, how to expect their teaching to be effective? In comparison, full-time tutors are probably able to focus on teaching because that's really their bread and butter.

 

The above are just 3 elements of the extremely complex education situation in SG which I feel are the most key to understanding why parents are attending tuition classes.

 

I look at my peers with children, they're busy bringing them to different enrichment classes and tuition every weekend. It's oversimplifying to just say that they're being kiasu. Most parents will try to support their kids as much as they can, and if the kids cannot cope with studies, parents try to help so that the kids do not lag too far behind and lose self confidence. Of course it'll be best if the kids like learning and pick up self study skills, and parents guide them in learning, instead of relying on tuition. Unfortunately it's easier said than done. While I don't support tuition, I won't fault the parents for sending kids for tuition because many parents are also stumped by the homework assignments the kids are expected to do.

 

As for parents who attend tuition to learn how to teach their kids, we should at least give them credit for being concerned and involved in their kids' learning. The art is to be involved and supportive, yet the kids do not become reliant on them.

[Bismarck]

don't quite agree.

 

Its all comes down to self motivation.  Don't count on schools to teach everything

 

if you go to western country schools, they are all like that.  They expect your kid to self explore and self motivate.  if you go to Universities, they are all like that.  You think the Professors will spoon feed you? 

 

In a class, the best form of teaching is through quizzes and Q&A, and role-play.  So the students are expected to know the theories before they step into the class.  They are there to ask questions and answer quizzes, not to sit there and listen to teacher reading from the book. 

 

if your kid is lazy and only want to play ipad at home, you blame who?  

 

if your kid is self motivated and will self study on his own, you praise who? 

 

This is the PROBLEM with our mindset.  

 

I see many parents send their kids to chinese language centres like Berries or Han.  The kids come out of the centres, after the chinese lesson ends, the parents started to talk to them in ENGLISH!!!  I seen it with my own eyes.  

 

How do you expect the kid to improve his bloody Chinese when the parents are not even talking to them in Chinese?!!   The parents thought the one hour per week Chinese lesson will do magic to his grade, is it

? 

 

Give them a break lah. The parents could be speaking in English to their children because their chinese is no good? And thats why they send their kids to chinese classes? 

Edited February 18, 2017 by Bismarck

[Bismarck]

While it may sound ludicrous, parents attending tuition is not difficult to understand and not surprising.

 

It's an awfully complex situation.

 

First of all, our nation's preoccupation with chasing (good) results. I grew up in the eighties, in a rather poor neighborhood, attended the primary school just 5mins walk away from home. I never had tuition but because of dedicated pri sch teachers, parents' encouragement and good study habits, did well in PSLE and the subsequent national exams, got my degree, got a stable job that pays reasonably well for me to afford a comfortable life. Many of my peers have similar experiences as me, our parents were not well educated, did not have resources to give us tuition nor enrichment classes but we did relatively well to get our degrees and social mobility was possible for us as a result of our 'success' in education. When people of my generation become parents, knowing the differences grades can make, they willingly devote money to support their children in learning through tuition and enrichment classes, and now parents themselves attending tuition to learn knowledge and techniques so as to help their kids 'win the race'. Can't blame them, especially when we consider my next 2 points.

 

Next, the current schooling demands on the young school children's cognitive abilities are insane. Many peers have kids in lower primary, every week they struggle to prepare their little boys and girls for English and Mother Tongue spellings. When I saw the spelling lists, I wonder why we expect our kids to memorize so much at such young age, even requiring them to do dictation of long sentences. And they are all studying in neighborhood primary schools, not some atas elite school. Once I was at a colleague's place for CNY dinner, her P1 girl brought home a Maths assignment and asked for help, all of us couldn't understand what the question was asking, eventually the girl's daddy who is working in MAS spent more than half an hour solving that one question, which apparently involved abstract conceptual thinking that is way above the cognitive ability of a P1 girl. Every time the colleague shows us her girl's tests or assignments, we'll get a shock at the kind of vocabulary the kids are supposed to read and understand. I also heard of pre-school Chinese weekly assignment being presentation on current news topic, the little kids have to talk about a recent piece of news in class, every week the parents struggle to prepare them for the presentation because the little kids just cannot do it on their own. During my time, school work was not demanding, and I had time to play and read extensively, I enjoy learning through reading even till this day. I can understand that at times we try to 'stretch' the kids' abilities but I think we're overdoing things. If even educated parents find the tasks set for young kids tough to handle, what are we trying to get the kids to learn? I don't blame our kids for not having the interest in learning. All the tuition, over-teaching and over-testing we see now probably demoralized many of them or killed their interest in learning, except for the exceptionally brilliant ones who might thrive on such challenges.

 

Third, when I was a student, school life was quite simple, just study and attend some ECAs, not a lot of other programmes, excursion was not a frequent occurrence. According to my teachers who have been teaching for decades (some even till now), they used to have time to focus on teaching-related work like lesson preparation and marking. Things have changed in schools now, with many more KPIs to meet and programs to run, so as to achieve 'holistic development', and the students get to take part in lots of programmes in school. However the teachers are stretched with the many increased demands like planning and running learning journeys and special programmes, and their time is more spent on non teaching related work leaving less time for teaching-related work. I support holistic development but it's unrealistic to expect teachers to deliver everything that's demanded of them, given limited time and energy. So the 'smarter' ones will focus on what gives the best yield in their work appraisal, and that's usually special programmes or contributions to the school. If teachers are unable to focus on teaching, how to expect their teaching to be effective? In comparison, full-time tutors are probably able to focus on teaching because that's really their bread and butter.

 

The above are just 3 elements of the extremely complex education situation in SG which I feel are the most key to understanding why parents are attending tuition classes.

 

I look at my peers with children, they're busy bringing them to different enrichment classes and tuition every weekend. It's oversimplifying to just say that they're being kiasu. Most parents will try to support their kids as much as they can, and if the kids cannot cope with studies, parents try to help so that the kids do not lag too far behind and lose self confidence. Of course it'll be best if the kids like learning and pick up self study skills, and parents guide them in learning, instead of relying on tuition. Unfortunately it's easier said than done. While I don't support tuition, I won't fault the parents for sending kids for tuition because many parents are also stumped by the homework assignments the kids are expected to do.

 

As for parents who attend tuition to learn how to teach their kids, we should at least give them credit for being concerned and involved in their kids' learning. The art is to be involved and supportive, yet the kids do not become reliant on them.

 

I agree. We are all in this system. If we cant beat them, we have to join them. We have to make full use of the system to our best advantage. 

 

As a parent we all want the best for our children. Kiasu? Talk is cheap, those who criticised parents who do their best for their children, are they going to be responsible when the parents' children fail? Study too much will put stress on the children? Stress is when there is no food on the table, no health to speak of, no future to look forward to. That is call stress. 

[Ktglfc]

I agree. We are all in this system. If we cant beat them, we have to join them. We have to make full use of the system to our best advantage.

 

As a parent we all want the best for our children. Kiasu? Talk is cheap, those who criticised parents who do their best for their children, are they going to be responsible when the parents' children fail? Study too much will put stress on the children? Stress is when there is no food on the table, no health to speak of, no future to look forward to. That is call stress.

In short, this is reality ...