My little suggestion - A parenting folder perhaps?

[Mason016]

I think TS is first time parent. I can understand the excitement especially your first and still an infant. But once the infant becomes "terrible 2" as in 2yo, "horrible 3", "vomit blood 4", etc etc you will think and talk differently. LoL...

 

Right now I have a "vomit blood 4" and the other becoming a "terrible 2". To tell you the truth I'm exhausted. The best time I think it's when they are at infant stage, once they know how to talk, walk and run, it will become a nightmare. Now when I get home it's like watching live wrestling match between the two. The wailing and crying, knn buay tahan. This is fatherhood. Welcome to hell. LoL...

 

LOL! I think you will scare him off and any other potential father.

 

Kids will also say

 

Kia-su parent when they are aged 5,

Kia-su, kia-si, all homework parent when they are 11-12

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Edited October 10, 2014 by Mason016

[Spring]

 

I have yet to convince the kids to join me in watching football matches

ok lah, they are still young, and let them enjoy their childhood :))

play some app games and balance with some outdoor activities, like swimming and playing police and thieves at the playground :)

Don't worry, slowly introduce. First with ball, jersey, video clips and then matches. They'll be fascinated that they wearing same jersey as the team in the TV

 

That said, I heard from some friends that their sons totally no interest no matter how hard he tries.

That one have to accept defeat and maybe just not their cup of tea!

[Joseph22]

 

 

if you hire a confinement lady from up north, let them do their job if you know they meant good, some of the way they handle babies may be a bit rough but it is part of conditioning process. many young parents may feel heart pain and stop or even fire the confinement lady for mistreating their kid.

Some are really mistreating...

[Watwheels]

 

LOL! I think you will scare him off and any other potential father.

 

Kids will also say

 

Kia-su parent when they are aged 5,

Kia-su, kia-si, all homework parent when they are 11-12

.

.

.

.

 

 

This is the hard truth. Just ask any father with grown up kids. When you have just one child it's actually not that tough, all your focus and energy is on that child alone. Very much like those Japanese families, only one child. When you have two you will have more challenges. Three or more you have to get more help. Going out is more or less preparing for the worst. With an addition child the challenge get tougher. No wonder some ppl just stop at one. If you dun have a maid or other family members to help out. Die. LoL...

[Mrmilktooth]

Some are really mistreating...

 

mine was from MY. through agency..

 

was skeptical at first but it turns out to be pleasant experience for us..

 

so that my wife dont mind asking the same lady for #2 if she is still working by then..

[Joseph22]

 

mine was from MY. through agency..

 

was skeptical at first but it turns out to be pleasant experience for us..

 

so that my wife dont mind asking the same lady for #2 if she is still working by then..

I prefer throught word of mouth.

 

Mine from north and through word of mouth.

 

She was okay until 3 rd child when she had taste of working with rich ppl.

I think TS is first time parent. I can understand the excitement especially your first and still an infant. But once the infant becomes "terrible 2" as in 2yo, "horrible 3", "vomit blood 4", etc etc you will think and talk differently. LoL...

 

Right now I have a "vomit blood 4" and the other becoming a "terrible 2". To tell you the truth I'm exhausted. The best time I think it's when they are at infant stage, once they know how to talk, walk and run, it will become a nightmare. Now when I get home it's like watching live wrestling match between the two. The wailing and crying, knn buay tahan. This is fatherhood. Welcome to hell. LoL...

When they reach 6 U will have free remote control.

 

When they reach 13 U will start missing them.

[Jman888]

Some are really mistreating...

 

 

depends on how the parents see it, different people can tolerate different level of treatment.

 

my cousin just had a baby and the MIL came over from KL to look after the grandbaby, she is an experience retired confinement lady and the way she handle her own grandchild, some of us think it was too rough (cold sweat!) but i dun think she is going to mistreat her own grandchild, just the environment/tenderness we were too used to, but that is how the kampong people raise their kids

[Watwheels]

When they reach 6 U will have free remote control.

 

When they reach 13 U will start missing them.

 

You mean a voice activated remote control.

[Jman888]

 

You mean a voice activated remote control.

 

 

he mean the out of order remote control

[Watwheels]

 

 

he mean the out of order remote control

 

LoL...I see...

[Joseph22]

 

 

depends on how the parents see it, different people can tolerate different level of treatment.

 

my cousin just had a baby and the MIL came over from KL to look after the grandbaby, she is an experience retired confinement lady and the way she handle her own grandchild, some of us think it was too rough (cold sweat!) but i dun think she is going to mistreat her own grandchild, just the environment/tenderness we were too used to, but that is how the kampong people raise their kids

Nurses are rough. If more rough then them is consider mistreat.

 

You mean a voice activated remote control.

yeah. Don't listen to jman. Lol. Edited October 10, 2014 by Joseph22

[Icebrush79]

@Icebrush79

Don't know if you read my reply to your earlier post about planning to leave with your father.

 

Here it is again...

 

My summary is that men just aren't very good at nuturing. In bringing up a kid, i would say women are the most important. The guys can do all the essentials but the extra touch is what makes women special. And women are much much more patient when it comes to nuturing the kids to speak or do things.

 

 

 

my 2nd one coming. I also might want to get a maid. But they not very keen and since the maid is going to be at their place mostly. I decided to hold off for now. Hahaha let everyone suffer a bit first

Lol. i buy almost all my girl's clothes online. Carters, Gap (only when have sale)

80-90% of her clothes is chosen by me.

 

 

 

Haha, I did bro, just thought that it is my best solution currently as my dad really love kids and seeing him taking care of my 4 mths old niece now, think he should be able to manage. But thanks for the advise anyways :)

 

[Lala81]

I think TS is first time parent. I can understand the excitement especially your first and still an infant. But once the infant becomes "terrible 2" as in 2yo, "horrible 3", "vomit blood 4", etc etc you will think and talk differently. LoL...

 

Right now I have a "vomit blood 4" and the other becoming a "terrible 2". To tell you the truth I'm exhausted. The best time I think it's when they are at infant stage, once they know how to talk, walk and run, it will become a nightmare. Now when I get home it's like watching live wrestling match between the two. The wailing and crying, knn buay tahan. This is fatherhood. Welcome to hell. LoL...

 

lol how come i hear my friend say primary school is the worst. Still have to help with homework. Ferry them to lessons etc.

Especially if your kid is nt doing well in sch.

[Mason016]

Haha, it's called "we need parents support and engagement".

[Atrecord]

I think TS is first time parent. I can understand the excitement especially your first and still an infant. But once the infant becomes "terrible 2" as in 2yo, "horrible 3", "vomit blood 4", etc etc you will think and talk differently. LoL...

 

Right now I have a "vomit blood 4" and the other becoming a "terrible 2". To tell you the truth I'm exhausted. The best time I think it's when they are at infant stage, once they know how to talk, walk and run, it will become a nightmare. Now when I get home it's like watching live wrestling match between the two. The wailing and crying, knn buay tahan. This is fatherhood. Welcome to hell. LoL...

 

wah ha ha… a classmate in univ once described his young sister (pri sch) as a 'public nuisance'. For a while after that, we used that to describe kids of that age.

 

I have yet to convince the kids to join me in watching football matches

ok lah, they are still young, and let them enjoy their childhood :))

play some app games and balance with some outdoor activities, like swimming and playing police and thieves at the playground :)

 

my P3 son started watching a bit of soccer last year, and this year became quite fixated on soccer already, even joined soccer CCA in school. Had stayed up or woke up late at night to watch world cup in Jun too.

 

He followed me, and supported Pool. Was idolizing Suarez late last year till last season's end… Asked my wife to buy soccer kits with suarez name.

 

This season, like me, v disappointed.

[Joseph22]

 

lol how come i hear my friend say primary school is the worst. Still have to help with homework. Ferry them to lessons etc.

Especially if your kid is nt doing well in sch.

Finger cross so far still okay. lol. Edited October 10, 2014 by Joseph22

[Spring]

I think TS is first time parent. I can understand the excitement especially your first and still an infant. But once the infant becomes "terrible 2" as in 2yo, "horrible 3", "vomit blood 4", etc etc you will think and talk differently. LoL...

 

Right now I have a "vomit blood 4" and the other becoming a "terrible 2". To tell you the truth I'm exhausted. The best time I think it's when they are at infant stage, once they know how to talk, walk and run, it will become a nightmare. Now when I get home it's like watching live wrestling match between the two. The wailing and crying, knn buay tahan. This is fatherhood. Welcome to hell. LoL...

 

I like your description on terrible 2, horrible 3 and vomit blood 4.

So I'll add on that when they grow up it will be the missing 16, disappearing 18 and gone with boyfriend 20!!

 

Yes, when children are toddlers it can be hell but better treasure it cos when their grown-ups, you want to watch their wrestling match and chase after them etc also cannot. Trust me I reach that stage liao and now vacuum so surf MCF loh........

Edited October 10, 2014 by Spring

[IDrago]

Frankly, nothing can ever prepare (guys especially) for parenthood, thus hope to have our very own little support group here

 

Just to contribute my personal experience (dad of an almost 4 MO)

 

Wowwwww…super wan lan eh!!!! The initial frustration is outstanding indeed!!! Perhaps it really depends on your luck too.

 

Mine wakes up every 2 hours and it takes an hour to coax her back to sleep. We didn’t hire a confinement lady cos my wife doesn’t want to be nagged at.

This lasted for 2 months and thankfully, she is able to sleep thru the night now .. whew.

 

Next up, most guys are TOTATLY CLUELESS handling babies. Perhaps it’s just not our innate ability or maybe you have the fear of hurting “something” so fragile. And the antenatal classes didn’t benefit me at all. Its akin to trading a demo account vs. a real account.. lol… Not to worry thou, cos here comes the missus. To be flat out honest, I am surprised how well my wife adapts to handling the child, it totally exceeds my expectations and it amazed me. Trouble comes if the wife has little patience when the man seems helpless. You will get naggings here and there until you master at least level 6 (of 10) of that particular skill.

 

Back to the night feedings…. You really have to empathise with your wife. Initially, I was like, ok, so you are not working and hence why do I even have to wake up at night to feed??? And then if you happen to be on leave for just one day, I swear you will be enlightened on the popular quote “Mothers are the toughest occupation” Well, that may not apply to super patient guys or those that loves children in a I enjoy (don’t mind doesn’t count) coaxing and attending to an incessantly crying child kind of way. To share a little more about myself.. I always love cute babies and hands to heart, I really do love my daughter, and hence, I would have thought the parental patience will come naturally. Boy..was I SO wrong…As long as you have even a fractional tinge of self centeredness you will understand the agony of the child’s need before yours… And you don’t have a choice cos, well, its YOUR child!!! And that doesn’t help when my wife’s characteristics is exactly like mine.. So, we learn to compromise.

 

Next section is on parents, in laws and theories about babies.. Grandparents always love their grandchildren… that love is pure, touching, totally amazing and can never be doubted…. But it can get overly zealous. Different people have different ways of caring for a child. This can be learned from friends, media, self help books, forums, professionals and opinion leaders… Trouble comes when your wife’s way of handling the child differs with the grandparents… You guys can all argue that well, give and take and blab la blue… but trust me, you will only be fine if your wife is the totally submissive type.. else… muahahahhahahahaahha…

 

Going out with friends... Honestly, I don’t have too much of a problem with that cos we have a mutual agreement that we can take turns to go out or together collectively as a family. But vanity takes a back seat, literally… I have turned up in weddings with a milk stain blazer and now go out most of the time in a cap. Going to work in “tip top condition” is challenging and squirreling off to the gym during lunch breaks is the only way to maintain your physique. When you are at home, you will be slaving to the little one and at this point of time, I much enjoy being at work then at home the whole day… It sounds kind of contradicting cos you tend to miss your little one too but I guess having a bit of me time is still important. I don’t know about the rest of the guys but I am expecting that days at home will get better when the child can communicate.. No idea yet cos I haven’t reached that milestone.

 

My experience thus far has taught me that being pro active in sharing the burden is extremely important (both husband and wife). For example when my wife helps with the entire night feeding without being told, I will feel grateful and reciprocate for the next 2 days happily and willingly and that has a positive effect that is exponential. It is also good to communicate and work as a team in which whoever does what better does that more. One of the worst thing to do is trying to avoid duties (i.e. pretending to sleep when the baby cries at night) when one party finally get up, he/she will do so grudgingly and this in turn can lead to anger being vent on the poor child.

 

Still the same ole, ENJOY WHILE YOU STILL CAN bro !!!!! It isn’t easy, but it will eventually be gratifying.