Will you marry her if she prefer to stay home & not working

[Lala81]

honestly, i know so many service jobs whereby the person doesn't have the opportunity to sit down.

It's just a sibei weak excuse.

[RadX]

Malaysian

 

 

ok.  family members?   as in family background, status class etc etc

 

most m'sian GFs i had were all responsible girls and never had such intentions

 

i would have expected if she was either prc, viet, pinoy, and the whole kampung come here 

 

 

another PI case haaaaaaa

honestly, i know so many service jobs whereby the person doesn't have the opportunity to sit down.

It's just a sibei weak excuse.

 

 

totally agree bro....sth does not add up here

 

 

anyway, funnily why ts shd come here and seek.  no frends to ask meh? exposure to society and all limited?  

 

cynical I am...

[Buadongdong]

There are actually a lot of admin jobs out there where the stress levels are acceptable. Probably the pay is not so attractive but still worth a shot at it. Do not have to always sit there also. Can move around and chit chat with colleagues when sit too long. My office admins are very eng eng cheng cheng 1 leh.

 

As for her lower back pain, you might wanna sound her out if she wanna have kids or not first. Try telling her that it is going to be very difficult taking care of the kids in future if the lower back pain is not fixed. Then from her response, you might know whether she wanna have kids in the first place or not.

 

Hope you find the answer to your predicament soon. Cheers!!

[Dfx16]

May not want to have kids.

 

Meaning not going back in work force and not earning anything.

 

 

My outright remark may hurt 

Do not want to have kid after marriage, there isnt a need to marry her, you dont need the paper to commit the relationship 

If need a maid after the marriage financially u will be extremely stress, it will end up with many heat argument also, so dont need to marry her

There's many other better girls out there that's willing to share responsibilites with you 

Edited November 25, 2016 by Dfx16

[Kusje]

Reason for not want to work-> low back pain, always feel pain when sit too long in office. (good reason)

 

Back pain might be a good reason but is it true? And is working the cause or does she need to lose weight? Got see doctor and try to resolve the issue? If it's sometime she's struggled with for some time (and you can see that she has struggled), then it could indeed be a good reason.

 

 

 

I will not mind if i take home 12K but will mean living a simple life style. 12K minus monthy outgoing is good to saving for both into retirement, for me at least. What say you guys?

 

If you make 12k? So what do you make? Is it enough for a simple life? If yes, then money is not a concern as long as you are willing to "endure" the simple life.

 

 

 

Lastly. She tried internet marketing, gave up few months cited too many following up and take long time to generate 1st income, and busy work load and work stress. 

 

Sounds like a damn lazy fellow looking to be a tai tai and sit around doing nothing. What's her plan? To be a home-maker (this includes housework and taking care of children) is acceptable but not otherwise.

Lastly. She tried internet marketing, gave up few months cited too many following up and take long time to generate 1st income, and busy work load and work stress. 

[Jman888]

Malaysian

 

 

if this type of malaysia char bo i dun mind, can sing at home and still make money  

 

[1fast1]

There are plenty of guys who don't have "working" wives.

 

Some women give up their previous jobs after mutual agreement with their husbands-to-be. Many men don't mind supporting their families. It's a personal choice (made with the spouse, obviously).

 

So there's nothing inherently wrong with it.

 

But if this is something she is demanding and you are not happy with it at all, then that's not an acceptable arrangement.

 

And if you can't see eye-to-eye on something so fundamental, maybe there are bigger problems on the horizon if you do get married.

 

(BTW, the reason I put "working" in quotes in the first line is that when I say "not working", it's very misleading and uncharitable. Being a homemaker and full-time mom, even with a maid to assist, is no joke. You gotta respect that. But if she pulls no weight at all in the home, then I wouldn't be too impressed).

[Kusje]

She has low back pain due to spine issue. That is why I am not sure how to zero in. Ask her to treat the low back pain.... She said expensive, so want me to foot the bill? huh?

 

Ditch her la.

[Ktglfc]

Reason for not want to work-> low back pain, always feel pain when sit too long in office. (good reason)

 

I will not mind if i take home 12K but will mean living a simple life style. 12K minus monthy outgoing is good to saving for both into retirement, for me at least. What say you guys?

 

She tried internet marketing, gave up few months cited too many following up and take long time to generate 1st income, and busy work load and work stress. 

 

Lastly...  prefer her man to buy a flat and not a cent from her.

 

and the contrasting part...She doesn't spend much, always pack lunch to office. And not keen on dress above $100 cited expensive. 

 

 

 

I think bros here have said ...

 

So, I just come in here and give a small bit of advice....

 

If you love her enough, all her shortcomings will be like dust, blown away by wind ....

If you love her enough, ignore the noise from surroundings ....

 

However, if you don't love her enough, doubts will come in, now or later ... then she may not be that girl for you ...

 

Ultimately its your choice, Bro ... think thru ...

All the best :)

[AFV_V200]

ok. family members? as in family background, status class etc etc

 

most m'sian GFs i had were all responsible girls and never had such intentions

 

i would have expected if she was either prc, viet, pinoy, and the whole kampung come here

 

 

another PI case haaaaaaa

 

 

 

totally agree bro....sth does not add up here

 

 

anyway, funnily why ts shd come here and seek. no frends to ask meh? exposure to society and all limited?

 

cynical I am...

Looking at more opinion before I make up my mind. Friends whom I had asked told me to get out. And yes I love her a lot but need to realistic of living cost in Singapore. Got hand got leg why don't work? Some friends of mine has back pain but still working.

 

I don't provide tai tai life style.

[Lala81]

My outright remark may hurt 

Do not want to have kid after marriage, there isnt a need to marry her, you dont need the paper to commit the relationship 

If need a maid after the marriage financially u will be extremely stress, it will end up with many heat argument also, so dont need to marry her

There's many other better girls out there that's willing to share responsibilites with you 

 

yeah.

Ultimately adults are selfish, we want our love to be reciprocated in kind.

If your significant other takes a lot and gives little, it's hard not to feel bitter.

 

The giving back maybe spiritual, may not necessarily be physical/monetary. But some element of giving back is required to reach an equilibrium.

 

If say, wife doesn't work but she's involved in doing volunteer work or doing something like painting/sculpting (pursuing her passions), these are acceptable.

If she stays home, wakes up late, eat, watch kdrama and go out and meet friends. Just dump her lol.

[Westkid]

Low back pain you will have problems in many positions.I am just being pragmatic.

[Evillusion]

May not want to have kids.

 

Meaning not going back in work force and not earning anything.

How do you yourself feel about her and are you comfortable being the sole provider? With children, the reasons for being a homemaker is justified but if she has no plans to have children, well, there will be a lot of assumptions especially in a public forum.

Nowadays its tough for a home based on a single salary with housing, vehicle loans and daily expenses and this does not include yearly holidays abroad or locally.

In every marriage, both parties needs to make sacrifices and compromises maybe not now but years down the road too!

Your best choice is for you to make and decide whats best.

[Toothiewabbit]

I thot I was in HWZ when I saw the thread title

 

Seriously, mutual attraction does not equate compatibility.

[SuPerBoRed]

totally agree bro....sth does not add up here

 

 

anyway, funnily why ts shd come here and seek.  no frends to ask meh? exposure to society and all limited?  

 

cynical I am...

 

aiya? i rem i got told to give benefit of the doubt by your kind before ley..  wrong side of the bed ah?

[RadX]

I thot I was in HWZ when I saw the thread title

 

Seriously, mutual attraction does not equate compatibility.

 

my thots exactly, thus the cynicism

aiya? i rem i got told to give benefit of the doubt by your kind before ley..  wrong side of the bed ah?

 

 

nb...wrong BED

 

 

fyi, have to be discerning and see ALL angles and sound the necessary......seen too many of these around for your respectable information kekekeke

[SuPerBoRed]

Looking at more opinion before I make up my mind. Friends whom I had asked told me to get out. And yes I love her a lot but need to realistic of living cost in Singapore. Got hand got leg why don't work? Some friends of mine has back pain but still working.

 

I don't provide tai tai life style.

 

ooc hw long together?

I thot I was in HWZ when I saw the thread title

 

Seriously, mutual attraction does not equate compatibility.

 

there is no 100% compatibilty .. its always about give and take... 

[Sunny]

if this type of malaysia char bo i dun mind, can sing at home and still make money  

 

 

 

I believe every rational feedback from bros here wont be music to TS' ears