So... A few months ago, a little fish captured the attention of the internet after it was filmed on its way to the ocean surface.

Fish, of course, break the water's surface all the time, but this fish was something else. Take a look here: 

So apparently this thing you're looking at is a black seadevil anglerfish, and it's rare for these things to come to the surface. The internet, having witnessed this, is naturally rife with speculation as to what exactly is going on.

A multitude of factors - from swim bladder issues, to pollution and global warming, and even more ominous Lovecraftian horrors - have been blamed for this anomaly.

But the most interesting of these, perhaps, are those who speculate that this tiny fish perhaps had some other purpose or calling in her last days.

Apparently Instagram and Tiktok is full of tributes to the little creature, and to other lives spent pursuing (un)achieved goals. I like this one by Florida-based cartoonist Harris Fishman (replicated here from @beetlemoses)

There's also this short this was circulated everywhere:

Ah, but what you're really here for, is that title. And as promised...

If you think the mating ritual of this pufferfish is strange, you might want to sit down for this one.

According to this page from the U.K. Natural History Museum at Tring:

"Males in the suborder Ceratioidei only grow to a fraction of the size of females. Females have the unmistakable dorsal spine with its luminous flesh lure at the end.

Males don't have the same head growth or the ability to attract prey. But what the male lacks in luminosity, he makes up for with an impeccable sense of smell that he uses to sniff out his future mate in the pitch-black expanse of the deep sea...

...he uses his small, sharp teeth to latch onto his intended's side, holding on for the rest of his (and her) life.

In some species the male becomes a permanent parasite on the female, his small body left simply trailing along in the water beside hers. Slowly he fuses to her, becoming an irremovable appendage.

In this relationship he is completely catered for. He no longer needs his eyes, so he loses the ability to use them and relies on his host for all of his nutrition. Even his bloodstream eventually connects with hers.

But he is an integral addition to her life, because the vital thing that that the male provides is a constant supply of sperm. This ensures that the female can produce fertile eggs for the rest of her life, making him vital to species survival."

Ok - one more a video for the more visually-oriented to figure out what exactly is going on: 

Maybe something to think about before you complain when the missus asks you to clean up the house.

Until next time.

~Clarence

Image courtesy of Wikipedia