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I hate my job. Should i quit now?


Sunlight
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TS, i am in somewhat of a similar position. Engineering industry, reasonably proficient/experienced in what i do and company has demand of those skills. A year ago was asked to take on managerial duties. I wouldn't say I dislike the management aspect, I'm okay with it, it's the stress from the people above and around you. I dun have problem sleeping :), but i have problem waking, thinking of all the shit that awaits me in the day ahead. Sometimes i would wake up 5 mins before my alarm would go off and i feel so frustrated that i can punch a hole in the wall. I recognise this is not healthy long term. 

To all those suggesting to downgrade back to a less stressful role, yes you can but that's not how performance management works in companies. You are not encouraged to stay still and continue doing what you are good at. You stay still, you will be "managed" out eventually. This contributes to the Peter principle mentioned. 

The jobs climate is pretty depressed right now, frankly if you have a job it is best to put up with it for now. I don't know what is your age, the older you are the harder it is to find equivalent role elsewhere or to start over. 

Me, I'll try to think positive thoughts throughout the day, interact as little as possible with the toxic people, treat myself to little luxuries and as much as possible give myself a break and recharge. 

Edited by Ganwb79
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I just had a mid career switch a year ago. Nearly a year into the job, I have thoughts of quitting as well at times due to constantly fire-fighting and night shift work. Can really see that as one goes up the cooperate ladder, the stress level and responsibility go up as well. I remember when I was an entry level employee, off work, my mind is totally at ease. Great that this post is open so that we all can share each other experiences and how we can overcome or divert the journey.

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I’m in a similar position but I love my job and although I can retire , I choose to remain active

and agreeably, I’ve always advocated Peters principle that is why I’m happy not to be promoted although the force is strong.. haha.. I’ve been at the top before and know what it’s like and thus, prefer a functional job whilst contributing to the best of my ability in my skill set 

 

hang in there TS, and try and find that common ground in managing people. It’s not easy and over time, with experience and wisdom, you will be able tO make it

 

if you are considering Heathcare, give me a pm and similar to what @Adrianli mentioned, do your homework first 

 

all The best

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Once upon a time, if you got a job, you hold to it tightly no matter what. Today, people have more choices which is not a bad thing. More importantly,  one needs to know how to de-stress yourself. Everyone of us is different,  however, if that task someone else can do, why is it that you can't? The reason is, you have alternative choice. If that is the case, then you should take that alternative. 

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The cb has also made ppl ask them daily , what am i doing that is creating value ? Ppl seem to be depressed abt that

 

nit A single day goes by without me thinking of throwing letter, so I have to be cognizant that it’s the current situation that makes us think that way too

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Whilst having a job currently and I am having thought of "quitting" at times. How I play around with it, is to give myself some time to accept that being on a new environment will take a year or two to become partially "run in" 😆 . My past experience of being transferring here and there and learning new things again somehow allow me to adjust to what I am going through better. 

Finally, while I am having the thought of giving up, one powerful thought I have is to think that at this pandemic times, there are people who are jobless and are financially tie down. They would have thought having a job is such a blessing. This thought does make me feel guilty and adjust my mindset to endure.

Just to share my thoughts when work gets shitty.

Edited by Heartbreakid
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6 hours ago, Ganwb79 said:

TS, i am in somewhat of a similar position. Engineering industry, reasonably proficient/experienced in what i do and company has demand of those skills. A year ago was asked to take on managerial duties. I wouldn't say I dislike the management aspect, I'm okay with it, it's the stress from the people above and around you. I dun have problem sleeping :), but i have problem waking, thinking of all the shit that awaits me in the day ahead. Sometimes i would wake up 5 mins before my alarm would go off and i feel so frustrated that i can punch a hole in the wall. I recognise this is not healthy long term. 

To all those suggesting to downgrade back to a less stressful role, yes you can but that's not how performance management works in companies. You are not encouraged to stay still and continue doing what you are good at. You stay still, you will be "managed" out eventually. This contributes to the Peter principle mentioned. 

The jobs climate is pretty depressed right now, frankly if you have a job it is best to put up with it for now. I don't know what is your age, the older you are the harder it is to find equivalent role elsewhere or to start over. 

Me, I'll try to think positive thoughts throughout the day, interact as little as possible with the toxic people, treat myself to little luxuries and as much as possible give myself a break and recharge. 

Agree with what you say. I try not to let the lousy thoughts run in my mind and get accumulated BUT instead try to look on the positive side to see what I have missed out on the good side.

Somehow, not all will be good at higher position as they progress upwards. I see some are just as happy without a high rank position.

I share the same experience on treating myself with little luxuries. To me is like a call for a simple celebration for a job well done end of a day OR after successfully gotten over a day of battling through fire fightings. This helps to calm the nerves better. Cheers!

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16 hours ago, Sunlight said:

I have been in engineering industry for many years, but recently the work scope is becoming unbearable. I used to love getting my hands dirty and getting things done, but after promoting to my current position, i now have to face many problems. Nowadays i cannot sleep properly, stressing about work. 

As i am debt free, I am thinking whether i should quit and move into another industry and start all over again. 

 

I dunno any theory of what any of the bros sis here mentioned, but a gauge to move on will be if you feel it's threatening your mental wellbeing despite taking all possible measures like discussing options, destress after work etc., it should be time to move forward. If possible, land yourself another job first. 

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2 minutes ago, Heartbreakid said:

Agree with what you say. I try not to let the lousy thoughts run in my mind and get accumulated BUT instead try to look on the positive side to see what I have missed out on the good side.

Somehow, not all will be good at higher position as they progress upwards. I see some are just as happy without a high rank position.

I share the same experience on treating myself with little luxuries. To me is like a call for a simple celebration for a job well done end of a day OR after successfully gotten over a day of battling through fire fightings. This helps to calm the nerves better. Cheers!

The higher the rank the shorter the span. Seen quite a fast turnover for a few I met. 

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8 hours ago, Volvobrick said:

I learn management from Dilbert series one, especially one great one:

The boss rewards above average performers with more work until their performance becomes average.....

https://dilbert.com/strip/2004-04-05

So don't wipe those tables too quickly - you will be assigned more tables till you can't finish your work!

That was exactly what my previous boss did to his staff. He rewarded his good performers with higher KPI until they can't meet so that in the following year's appraisal, he got reasons not to give them high PB.  

 

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18 hours ago, Sunlight said:

I have been in engineering industry for many years, but recently the work scope is becoming unbearable. I used to love getting my hands dirty and getting things done, but after promoting to my current position, i now have to face many problems. Nowadays i cannot sleep properly, stressing about work. 

As i am debt free, I am thinking whether i should quit and move into another industry and start all over again. 

 

The grass may not be greener on the other side. And how long have you been in this current role ? If you are there long enough, maybe you can negotiate to another non managerial role?

If income and higher pay matters to you, you would still have to people manage at some point as managers would generally get higher pay than those not in mgmt.

Another question is, how old are you now ?

 

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53 minutes ago, Roh96 said:

That was exactly what my previous boss did to his staff. He rewarded his good performers with higher KPI until they can't meet so that in the following year's appraisal, he got reasons not to give them high PB.  

 

Boss will always give more to those whom they can rely on to deliver. That is not going to change. 

Instead of slowing down on the wiping, understand the leverage you have and negotiate on what you want.  No boss wants to lose a good resource. 

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4 hours ago, Philipkee said:

How exactly is a rubber band gonna help?

TS says he is very stress at work so I say use rubber band to de stress lah.

Use rubber band to make a target board and then use your fingers to shoot shoot the target.

You got try shoot shoot rubber band before? Its very fun.

:a-happy:

image.png.0ec7d734c668e98cea1d00d4ba42d8e7.png

image.png.951062c6fb39cd0ca7dddb3a03475405.png

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18 hours ago, Sunlight said:

I have been in engineering industry for many years, but recently the work scope is becoming unbearable. I used to love getting my hands dirty and getting things done, but after promoting to my current position, i now have to face many problems. Nowadays i cannot sleep properly, stressing about work. 

As i am debt free, I am thinking whether i should quit and move into another industry and start all over again. 

 

TS, I just tell you something i heard.

A vietnamese general met an American General.

The American general remarked," you know, you never defeated us in the battle field."

The Vietnamese general replied," I know.  But that is also irrelevant."

My point.  No matter what decision you make today, it will be irrelevant in five years time.  In the sense that if you stayed in, in five years time, your problem now would have been solved one way or another.  If you quit, same thing.

So the sub point now is not stress too much.  The problem will fade away and five years later you will wonder why u were so stressed.  Sometimes people hold on to problems so tightly like it will be for life.

Unless your current boss is your MIL like @JamescMIL then no hope liao.  Gonna be a lifelong problem..... :D

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2 hours ago, Heartbreakid said:

Whilst having a job currently and I am having thought of "quitting" at times. How I play around with it, is to give myself some time to accept that being on a new environment will take a year or two to become partially "run in" 😆 . My past experience of being transferring here and there and learning new things again somehow allow me to adjust to what I am going through better. 

Finally, while I am having the thought of giving up, one powerful thought I have is to think that at this pandemic times, there are people who are jobless and are financially tie down. They would have thought having a job is such a blessing. This thought does make me feel guilty and adjust my mindset to endure.

Just to share my thoughts when work gets shitty.

you know how i cope?

 

i buy a new car....i kid you not

 

the last time, i was so depressed that i went into a car showroom and bought a car....regretted and changed again after 4 months ..🤣

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thanks all for the sharing. I want to look for the lowest ranking job. I want to go home on time and enjoy my time.

I floated the idea of quitting when i realised that i have paid my housing loan and can rent it for to supplement whatever income the lowest ranking job is.

My current boss's boss are ex colonels who think they need more ex LTC/Maj to support them as senior management. Their thinking is that got SOP can run the show already, reduce the mid management and ground staff by automation and digitization. Anything else push to contractor, but they KPKP when contractor show them the cost. They give general management statements to quickly brush away experienced staff feedback on technical requirements and how the system should operate.... 50% of experienced staff left within 9mth after SAF appeared. I thought i can tahan, but SAF is winning 😕

So now i want to be at the extreme end of the food chain so i no need to juggle human.

 

@Rax, Adrianli. do you have lobang for lowly therapy assistant post?

 

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Lifelong problems are the best

because no one lives forever.

[flowerface]

54 minutes ago, Philipkee said:

TS, I just tell you something i heard.

A vietnamese general met an American General.

The American general remarked," you know, you never defeated us in the battle field."

The Vietnamese general replied," I know.  But that is also irrelevant."

My point.  No matter what decision you make today, it will be irrelevant in five years time.  In the sense that if you stayed in, in five years time, your problem now would have been solved one way or another.  If you quit, same thing.

So the sub point now is not stress too much.  The problem will fade away and five years later you will wonder why u were so stressed.  Sometimes people hold on to problems so tightly like it will be for life.

Unless your current boss is your MIL like @JamescMIL then no hope liao.  Gonna be a lifelong problem..... :D

 

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