Darth_mel 1st Gear May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 (edited) Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board.We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad weather,and partly due to the search for a missing tyre. This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in India. And, if luck is in our favour, we may even be landing on your village! Our company has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us! It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our passengers have reached their destination. If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off. To make your free fall to earth pleasant and m memorable, we serve Complimentary DHARU and Wada pavw. For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God! We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs, we will be flying right next to British Airways, where their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window. There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down! In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible. For the best view, if however, we go a little too close, do let us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark! Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase. Edited May 9, 2009 by Darth_mel ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Veryfree Clutched May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board.We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad weather,and partly due to the search for a missing tyre. This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in India. And, if luck is in our favour, we may even be landing on your village! Our company has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us! It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our passengers have reached their destination. If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off. To make your free fall to earth pleasant and m memorable, we serve Complimentary DHARU and Wada pavw. For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God! We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs, we will be flying right next to British Airways, where their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window. There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down! In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible. For the best view, if however, we go a little too close, do let us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark! Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase. this is what you expect when you pay peanuts. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Limxiaoming 2nd Gear May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 What a racist joke. But i laughed my head off la wahahaha. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ahgongwolve Clutched May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 What a racist joke. But i laughed my head off la wahahaha. Who say racist joke.. more like a nationalist joke.. cos it's about INDIA not INDIAN Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cutebeat Clutched May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 (edited) the pilot forgot to mention about other passengers clinging on top of the aircraft. they need to carry umbrellas with them in case it rains and also as a substitute for parachute to drop off the plane when they saw their village below. Edited May 9, 2009 by Cutebeat Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ahgongwolve Clutched May 9, 2009 Share May 9, 2009 And forgot about the state of the TOILETS.... Anyone experienced it before? POWER! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amortifiedpenguin Clutched May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 i can say that its not exactly accurate as Air India actually code-share flights with Singapore Airlines. So while you guys are laughing at some foreign country's airline you actually are laughing at your own national carrier! Suppport: Air India's Code-Share Partners If you would, Air Egypt is a good place to start. They crash pretty often. And since we're on the topic of planes, Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelpie 2nd Gear May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 i can say that its not exactly accurate as Air India actually code-share flights with Singapore Airlines. So while you guys are laughing at some foreign country's airline you actually are laughing at your own national carrier! Suppport: Air India's Code-Share Partners If you would, Air Egypt is a good place to start. They crash pretty often. And since we're on the topic of planes, I sat in Sri Lankan Airline long long time before...and I thought I was in a C130. Not only it is noisy but you see "smoke" coming out from the air vents everynow and then (don't know why). When returning, the flight was delayed, because they found missing passengers on board the plane (something like that) . Regards, Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amortifiedpenguin Clutched May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 I sat in Sri Lankan Airline long long time before...and I thought I was in a C130. Not only it is noisy but you see "smoke" coming out from the air vents everynow and then (don't know why). When returning, the flight was delayed, because they found missing passengers on board the plane (something like that) . Regards, smoke is to create a mysterious and calming atmosphere. missing passengers is probably because they didn't take attendance before taking off. (or they ran out of fuel and needed to sacrifice some) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spidercool 1st Gear May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Contax 1st Gear May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ on indian airlines ? Among the other india carriers , I find jetairways and kingfisher airlines much better than air india and india airlines . Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ahgongwolve Clutched May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ Siao liao 1. mumbai is a hotbed for terrorist 2. the traffic is s--t 3. crowd is s--t 4. weather is shittiest 5. sure kena lau sai jialat jialat 6. smell lagi terrible.. they dont clean the roads often Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ahgongwolve Clutched May 10, 2009 Share May 10, 2009 ok lah... at least their stewardess are... females Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simplesilver 1st Gear May 15, 2009 Share May 15, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ Well. Have fun there!~ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amortifiedpenguin Clutched May 15, 2009 Share May 15, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ farewell to another good mcf member. do try to make it back alive. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerms Clutched May 15, 2009 Share May 15, 2009 farewell to another good mcf member. do try to make it back alive. LOL Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth_mel 1st Gear May 15, 2009 Author Share May 15, 2009 s--t, I'm going to mumbai next week ............ Hope you know how to swim....otherwise, thank you for flying with Indian Airlines. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSide Neutral Newbie May 16, 2009 Share May 16, 2009 Hey,guys.... Listen to this... Cheers! 15_Airline_Reservation_1.mp3 ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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