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Watwheels

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Watwheels

Watwheels

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http://www.divaasia.com/article/14475

 

Finances are top stumbling block to marriage

by Sophie Hong

 

THE majority of single Singapore women still hope to get married between the ages of 25 and 30, despite national statistics showing a trend of them putting off marriage.

 

In a recent straw poll done by my paper of 70 single women aged 35 years old and below, 57 women indicated that they hope to tie the knot eventually.

 

However, their dreams of attaining marital bliss are obscured by financial woes and finding that elusive Mr Right.

 

Among the reasons why they remain single, 32 women said that it is because they have yet to find the right partner.

 

Others who hold white-collar jobs with a monthly income of more than $2,000 stated that they are looking to establish a career first before shifting their focus to their love lives.

 

"Women are getting more educated, compared to the past. Now, more Singaporean women hold master's or PhD degrees," said Ms Violet Lim, founder of dating agency Lunch Actually.

 

According to the Census of Population 2010, women make up almost half of university graduates in Singapore.

 

To top it off, the number of female doctoral-degree students at Nanyang Technological University (NTU) has gradually climbed, from 31 per cent to 35 per cent over the last five years.

 

NTU has also enrolled more than 4,000 female students in its postgraduate courses in the last academic year.

 

Meanwhile, 38 per cent of the students who enrolled in a postgraduate programme at Singapore Management University last September are female. Similarly, the National University of Singapore (NUS) saw an 83 per cent increase in its number of female doctoral-degree students, compared to 2005.

 

The time taken to complete a postgraduate programme can range from one to five years.

 

Ms Lim said: "When you have spent so much time on your education, you would want to build up a career first before moving on to relationships."

 

However, there might be factors other than a higher education that have contributed towards women becoming more career-minded as well as an increase in the number of career- minded women.

 

Said Associate Professor Tan Ern Ser of NUS' Department of Sociology: "Singaporean women also value their independence, which would be compromised if they take on the role of both a wife and a mother."

 

Women are also delaying marriage due to finances, with 29 women polled saying that their biggest concern is whether they have enough savings. A further 13 women worry about being unable to afford a house.

 

Among the 70 women polled, 64 earn a monthly income of less than $4,000.

 

"A house is an investment, and if I'm going to be spending a small fortune on it, I want to make sure that it is in a good location," said 24-year-old operations executive Stephanie Kay.

 

She added that she may still need financial help from her parents after marriage if she wants "a decent place".

 

Said Ms Kay: "I would feel comfortable letting my husband be the sole breadwinner only if he earns $20,000 a month."

 

Ms Lim also commented on what former prime minister Lee Kuan Yew said to a 27-year-old female PhD student during a university dialogue held at NTU on Sept 5.

 

Mr Lee had advised the unmarried student not to waste time starting a family, as it was "more important and more satisfying than your PhD".

 

Ms Lim said: "I can tell you, from my experience in the industry, that there is truth to what he said. Time is not on our side."

 

She added: "It might be a good strategy for men to focus on their careers before their relationships, but that is not the case for women."

 

Ms Lim stressed that having a career and a love life are not mutually exclusive, and finding a balance between the two is not impossible.

 

"Be disciplined in setting aside time to go out, relax and socialise," she advised.

 

Survey of 70 single women aged 35 and below

 

57 women plan to get married.

 

Out of these, 44 plan to have kids; 42 plan to tie the knot before they turn 30 years of age; and 26 plan to have children two years after their wedding.

 

13 women say they do not plan to get married.

 

They cite reasons such as the cost of living and that Singapore men are boring.

 

32 women say they are single because they have yet to find the right partner.

 

Another 20 say they are focusing on their careers while 12 women say they are focusing on their education.

 

These women are aged between 21 and 30 years old.

 

Six women cite following reasons why they are single: They are uninterested in dating; they do not have enough time for relationships; and there are not enough eligible men in Singapore.

 

42 women say they worry about financial matters when it comes to marriage.

 

Their biggest concerns are whether they have enough savings (29) and whether they have the means to buy a house (13).

 

35 women say they will consider having children if they are offered better maternity benefits.

 

These benefits include longer maternity leave, equal chances of promotion when they return to work and a bigger Baby Bonus.

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Watwheels

Watwheels

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http://forums.asiaone.com/showthread.php?t=42994

 

Local men going for Thai mistresses

According to a senior lawyer, 20% of local adultery cases now involve Thai women.

 

Divorce lawyer Chen Xiu Jin told Lianhe Wanbao about this new trend, and added that the men involved are usually professionals below the age of 40. They include bankers, accountants, engineers, lawyers and even entrepreneurs who make upwards of $50,000 a month.

 

Chen notes that men in the past tended to have affairs with local or Chinese national women. In comparison, Thai women often have less demands on men and are now popular among white-collar professionals.

 

There is no doubt that Thai women now have a share in the "mistress market" pie.

 

Relating her experience from past cases, Chen said she had seen married men go to nightspots for Thai women up to five times a week. They can spend more than $10,000 a night on the women.

 

 

 

According to a senior lawyer, 20% of local adultery cases now involve Thai women.

She said, "Eventually, these men find that they cannot afford these huge expenses even though they are financially secure to begin with."

 

According to Chen, one man even borrowed money from his wife to spend on these Thai women.

 

"Of course, the wife eventually got suspicious and the truth came out," she said.

 

Even more astonishing is that these men's wives are not usually housewives but new-age women with their own careers.

 

"These wives are in their 30s and no less attractive than the Thai women so it is difficult to understand why the men stray," said Chen.

 

"These young, attractive, new-age wives also get very hurt by the affairs," she added.

 

A man who divorced his wife of nine years to marry a Thai woman he met in a nightspot shares his view on the issue.

 

The former security adviser thinks that Singaporean women are too "princessy" and Thai women are more gentle and likeable. He also feels that Thai women are "more independent", have less expectations of men, and know how to please them.

 

He recalls that his Singaporean ex-wife often demanded his company. "When I couldn't accompany her, she'll quarrel with me," he said.

 

"She rarely cooks and I have to do most of the chores at home."

 

On his new Thai wife, he said, "She's great at cooking and good with chores. I think she makes a good wife and mother."

 

First published: Lianhe Wanbao

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Watwheels

Watwheels

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Looks like the concept of marriage is going down for good in the very near future. Women seems to be looking for some kind of deal while men are looking for a mother to cook & clean for them. :D

 

Sgp govt can give up hope relying on locals to get married and have children.

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Mockngbrd

Mockngbrd

Supersonic
(edited)

its all bout the money... its all bout the dum dum da di di dum

 

get married immediately go into debt liao hg hg

 

 

Said Ms Kay: "I would feel comfortable letting my husband be the sole breadwinner only if he earns $20,000 a month."

 

They cite reasons such as the cost of living and that Singapore men are boring.

 

Six women cite following reasons why they are single: They are uninterested in dating; they do not have enough time for relationships; and there are not enough eligible men in Singapore.

 

SG men:

forever-alone-meme-t2981.jpg

Edited by Mockngbrd
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Sabbie

Sabbie

Clutched

Go motherland and find a wife, many of my brudders had done so and are happily married with kids, they don't mind staying with parents as in china most families stay together, no like SG gals...knn can you buy a unit at marina bay residences to stay? knnbccb

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Watwheels

Watwheels

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If the husband can earn $20k or more a month, he will end up having affair with some foreign woman. Wtf for?

 

Ppl get their priorities all wrong.

 

 

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Picnic06-Biante15

Picnic06-Biante15

Supersonic

Money is never enough, it's just a matter of perpectives

 

nope..... its not money.

 

Its our women too materialistic. Why in the past, no such problem ? Women then are matchmake and their thought are, married a chicken goes with the chicken, married a dog goes with the dog ..... :ph34r:[:p]

 

Nowadays, they want to choose and by then reach 35, too late leow .... [:(]

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Watwheels

Watwheels

Supersonic
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mayb those women got interviewed too demanding so all the guys they meet no interested in dating them

If the woman open mouth, close mouth all talk about $$$$, listen liao also sian lah. And the irony is that they say sgp men boring. Well, of course they are if they have to listen to all that crap.

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Sabbie

Sabbie

Clutched

nope..... its not money.

 

Its our women too materialistic. Why in the past, no such problem ? Women then are matchmake and their thought are, married a chicken goes with the chicken, married a dog goes with the dog ..... :ph34r:[:p]

 

Nowadays, they want to choose and by then reach 35, too late leow .... [:(]

 

I have to agree with you, especially girls in my industry, last time I got a staff so happy her potential father in law got 1 million in his account, I was like wtf...FIL money also want to target....fccb....

 

35 is not too late la, but if want to have kids maybe not so good to be so old...

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Sabbie

Sabbie

Clutched

Just like cars.....men like to try new gadgets and cars all the time.

Some men just like to try new women!

 

I URGE ALL BROS HERE TO BE FAITHFUL TO THEIR WIVES!

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