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This is an absolute classic. The following is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation in October 1995, between a US Navy ship off the coast of England, and the British authorities. The transcript was released by the Ministry of Defence on 10/10/95. BRITS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision. AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision.. BRITS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. AMERICANS: This is the Captain of US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. BRITS: Negative. I say again. You will have to divert your course. AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS ACCOMPANY US. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH. THAT'S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP. [/size] BRITS: WE ARE A LIGHTHOUSE, F**K OFF