Jokes Corner

[Mazdaowner]

Angry husband is not satisfied with his wife & sends a sms to his Mother in law.

 

Your product is not matching my requirements.

 

Smart Mother in law replys -

Warranty expired, manufacturer not responsible after seal is broken.

 

Wait husband reply: "WHAT SEAL???!!!"

[Scb11980]

so...... you trying to imply that want to play, stay at ground floor...

 

hi bro

dont read so much

there are no hidden message

it is just a reply to a question

 

peace

 

have a wonderful day ahead

[Maxus-MIFA9]

Wait husband reply: "WHAT SEAL???!!!"

 

and he further text : sorry, seal still intact, only sore throat can refund?

[Mazdaowner]

and he further text : sorry, seal still intact, only sore throat can refund?

 

You tell your mother in law lor.

[Nicfoo]

And who are you to keep questioning mods on what we do and say?

 

 

I did not see any linkage between the title, his post and your post.

 

Hence, I asked a question. Do you classified it as questioning?

[Nicfoo]

why is it that u cannot control urself when u see his 2 yellow cards? very funny meh?

 

 

Tripod backfire.

 

No, it is not funny.

 

It is very funny. LOL.

[Mazdaowner]

I did not see any linkage between the title, his post and your post.

 

Hence, I asked a question. Do you classified it as questioning?

 

Yes.

[Nicfoo]

Yes.

 

 

Fine.

[Nicfoo]

Although you are on my ignore list, still i went through your latest posts.

 

How did you received a second yellow card from rice cooker and jokes?

[Scb11980]

Although you are on my ignore list, still i went through your latest posts.

 

How did you received a second yellow card from rice cooker and jokes?

 

thanks for reading

 

the second yellow card

i also blur

 

but it seems even before the 7th month

many are already busy collecting

yellow hands to burn like offerings

 

your replies are often so surgical

if you know what i mean

 

just relax

nobody i believe is out to "kill" anybody

everybody just post

sometimes silly

sometimes it may appear personal or abit off

but often it was posted without the intention to hurt or harm

 

you seem to be very keen in many topics

anything that really you are interested in that we all can discuss about

eg hi-fi, travel or something that you really enjoy doing and can share with us

 

thanks

 

[Nicfoo]

thanks for reading

 

the second yellow card

i also blur

 

but it seems even before the 7th month

many are already busy collecting

yellow hands to burn like offerings

 

your replies are often so surgical

if you know what i mean

 

just relax

nobody i believe is out to "kill" anybody

everybody just post

sometimes silly

sometimes it may appear personal or abit off

but often it was posted without the intention to hurt or harm

 

you seem to be very keen in many topics

anything that really you are interested in that we all can discuss about

eg hi-fi, travel or something that you really enjoy doing and can share with us

 

thanks

 

 

 

Anything I am keen in discussing??? Why sure yes.

 

Communism and Democracy!!!!

 

But will the discussion earn you a third yellow?

[Scb11980]

Anything I am keen in discussing??? Why sure yes.

 

Communism and Democracy!!!!

 

But will the discussion earn you a third yellow?

 

communism interesting subject

 

democracy

i use to think very highly of this

but when you look around

does true democracy really exist

if it does it is often mare with self-interest

 

as for communism

i like the social equity bit

but if you are brillant and rich, it is difficult to share when other lazy bone milk for effort

 

infact both have their strengths and weakness

but because the sheer fact that

the basic flaw of human being is greed

makes the idea form of democracy and communism difficult to achieve

 

what are your views

 

[Scb11980]

Today's Joke

 

Condom Size Expert

A guy goes into a drugstore to buy condoms. "What size?" asks the clerk. "Gee, I don't know." "Go see Sophie in aisle 4." He goes over to see Sophie, who grabs him in the crotch, and yells, "Medium!" The guy is mortified! He hurries over to pay and leaves quickly.

 

Another guy comes in to buy condoms, and gets sent to Sophie in aisle 4. Sophie grabs him and yells, "Large!" The guy struts over to the register, pays, and leaves.

 

A high school kid comes in to buy condoms. "What size?" The kid embarassedly says "I've never done this before. I don't know what size."

 

The clerk sends him over to Sophie in aisle 4.

She grabs him and yells... "Clean up in aisle 4!""

 

 

 

 

[Scb11980]

Food for thoughts

 

Please feel free to add

 

 

 

CIGARETTE:

A pinch of tobacco

rolled in paper

with fire at one end

and a fool at the other!

 

 

MARRIAGE:

It's an agreement

wherein

a man loses his bachelor degree

and a woman gains her master

 

 

LECTURE:

An art of transmitting Information

from the notes of the lecturer

to the notes of students

without passing through the minds

of either

 

 

CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man

multiplied by the

number present

 

 

 

 

 

[Scb11980]

YAWN:

The only time

when some married men

ever get to open

their mouth

 

 

[Scb11980]

FATHER:

A banker

provided by

nature

 

DOCTOR:

A person who kills

your ills by pills,

and kills you by his bills!

 

[Djim]

One dismal rainy night in Geylang Road, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was startled to see a dripping wet, naked woman sitting in the back seat.

 

"Where to Miss?" he stammered.

 

"Jurong," answered the woman.

 

"Ok, I got it," he said, taking another long glance in the mirror.

 

The woman caught him staring at her and asked, "Just what the hell are you looking at driver?"

 

"Well madam," he answered, "I was just wondering how you'll pay your fare?"

 

The woman spread her legs, put her feet up on the front seat, smiled at the driver and said, "Does this answer your question?"

 

Still looking in the mirror, the cabby asked, "Got anything smaller?"

[Djim]

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the taxi, nearly hit a bus, went up the footpath and stopped centimeters from a shop window.

 

For a second, everything went quiet in the cab, then the taxi driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylight out of me".

 

The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realized that a little tap would scare you so much".

 

The taxi driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been a driver of a funeral van for the last 10 years".