Innovative Job Firing

[Darth_mel]

In a large multinational company..............

 

A fire alarm rang at 4 PM in a large office when almost all employees were in office (approx 5000). As usual the entire office was evacuated within 3 minutes and all employees gathered outside the office in the designated area waiting for further announcement.

 

The Security Officer in charge made the following announcement: "Dear employees - with sincere regret I have been asked to announce that for many of you it will be your last evacuation drill. Due to the recession the company is laying off almost half of its employees. So when this announcement finishes, I ask all of you to head back to the building and if your swipe card does not work then it means you have been laid off and in which case you will not be allowed inside and all your belongings will be couriered to you by tomorrow.

 

The Company has used this innovative approach as we didn't want to fill up the email box with lay-off mails and good bye mails in the thousands and also to avoid any fights inside the office and the consequent security issue for all staff.

 

Hope you have had a rewarding career with us and all the best ahead.

 

Please head back in and try your luck!".

[Albeniz]

This can't be true :)

[Yuan]

In a large multinational company..............

 

A fire alarm rang at 4 PM in a large office when almost all employees were in office (approx 5000). As usual the entire office was evacuated within 3 minutes and all employees gathered outside the office in the designated area waiting for further announcement.

 

The Security Officer in charge made the following announcement: "Dear employees - with sincere regret I have been asked to announce that for many of you it will be your last evacuation drill. Due to the recession the company is laying off almost half of its employees. So when this announcement finishes, I ask all of you to head back to the building and if your swipe card does not work then it means you have been laid off and in which case you will not be allowed inside and all your belongings will be couriered to you by tomorrow.

 

The Company has used this innovative approach as we didn't want to fill up the email box with lay-off mails and good bye mails in the thousands and also to avoid any fights inside the office and the consequent security issue for all staff.

 

Hope you have had a rewarding career with us and all the best ahead.

 

Please head back in and try your luck!".

 

I am curious whether the swipe card works when the CEO/managing director and those key management personnel of the company tries to enter after the announcement is finished.

[Scoots]

Dos it mean that those who did not get out of the building during the drill get to keep their jobs too?

Edited February 21, 2009 by Scoots

[Peqasus]

ha. never has it been more timely to be taking a crap when the alarm rings

[Twofouronenite]

I spoke with a German once while in HK airport. He told me being jobless, one can claim USD$2000 from their garhmen. Guess if this is in Germany they can still survive.

[Osiris]

dear employer, i left my diamonds in the office, since I can't go in, please write me a check for what they are worth. $5m