Interesting.... woman's view on Singapore man getting foreign brides

[Dynaway]

http://www.littlespeck.com/content/lifesty...tyle-021126.htm

 

may be a bit old... but i wonder if there's still any changes now....

Edited July 26, 2008 by Dynaway

[Friendstar]

[Route88]

Brudder,the article was in the year 2002. Nobody bothers?

No wonder can see many old maid

[Dynaway]

muahaha.... looks like loosing out to foreign talents... lol

[Limhm]

I felt tt it's still acceptable for a young educated S'pore man to marry a young educated Foreign woman...tis is wat I can see when I was in NUS...too many foreign students and staff...n oso have Foreign man marrying S'pore woman. Tink in both cases, cultural n language differences are great impact. N had to be prepared to move to another country...a sacrifice to me though...And I could see many of my gf frens had been put on the shelf...mostly unattached n are in their mid 30's. Felt sorry for my gfs lor...

 

But it's NOT ok if these foreign brides were to snatch another person's husband...these foreign brides r so young n for them to marry a 50's or 60's man...I totally cant accept. Everytime when I hear from frens tt their fathers remarry a China young girl, I will curse n swear...Tink my reaction too big but I jus cant stand. Whenever I see a young foreign woman wif an old man, I will stare at them n really hate them.

 

But in general, I do not really encourage Singapore man having foreign brides unless they r really ugly or too old to get one...I asked my hb b4 if he will marry a foreign bride...his ans is a straight NO...he said got so many S'pore girls, y make more trouble to marry a foreign wife...n he added tt he felt even luckier to hav found me as his wife(a S'pore woman). Keke

[Mrlazy]

maybe he just sweet talk nia.

[Hao80]

I met my wife to be in NTU and she is not a local.

 

Some of her friends' bf are also Singaporean and will be getting married within this year.

 

As for my friends, discounting those who are still single, I think close to 60% of my friends have foreign gf.

 

So you can see that the Singapore we know of is not the same ten years before. Now we are seeing much more foreign talents coming over here for studies. Naturally, there will be more cases of cross-cultural relationship.

 

Sometimes is a matter of chemistry/actual situation rather than a matter of choice. Given a choice, I would still prefer a local but the situation at my time was different. Not many local girls took engineering subjects and even those I am interested in were already attached... until I met her..

 

And getting a foreign gf/wife doesn't guarantee your life will be a bed of roses, a foreign gf/wife gives other problems that a local girl will not give you. Some sacrifices are required. I personally feels under normal circumstances, a local guy will not choose a foreign girl on purpose.

 

 

But come to think of it, why quite a few of the guys I know went for foreign ? Might need to gather them to discuss.

[Tckrto]

depends on your luck lah. my wife is local leh. not all local gals are materialistic just a portion. as we singaporean like to say "no fish, shrimp oso can" depends on how high your expectations is

Edited July 26, 2008 by Tckrto

[Limhm]

Ya...even sweet talk is something v wonderful...from a hb to a wife...we r a married couple for more than 10 yrs n I tink I m lucky to hav a hb still sweet talking me...U jealous ah... Sweet talk to ur loved ones n it will make relationship even better...

[Limhm]

I m one of the singapore wife too...kekeke

 

My gfs who are still single, they r not too materialistic...jus not fated, IMO.

Edited July 26, 2008 by Limhm

[Tckrto]

u one of them? means wat? u married to foreign? sorry for being slow ah.

[Limhm]

Agree to wat u said...I had a guy fren, married a foreign wife, both oso in engineering background...Tink it's really chemistry at tat time, tat make them tgt.

 

Whether local or singaporean, both have their own sets of problems.

 

Ask u a personal qn..eg. if u were to marry a foreign wife from China..hav 2 kids liao...then ur wife said she would wan to retire in China at the age of 50...will u stay in S'pore or China...This is wat my fren faced now...

[Limhm]

I m one of the Singaporean girl, married to a loving Singaporean guy.

[Hao80]

Think will be in Sg ba. Somemore the kids will be grown locally and accustom to Sg culture. So even their mum want to go back, don't think the kids will follow her. She might have to lan lan stay...

 

I have already ask and settle this issue during our dating period. But again, this option to live in another foreign country have to leave it open. Nobody knows the day where Sg can not longer progress further economically. I may need to go out to venture further in another country.

Edited July 26, 2008 by Hao80

[Hao80]

Another thing to bring out...

 

For foreign gf/wife, certain things have to bring out on hand before actual commitment to each other.

 

Eg. If lets say the wife's parent is ill and need somebody for long term care, what should u do ? If You prepare to sacrifice your time with your wife as she will be back home for long period of time. Kid/ housework you have to take them all..

 

Sometimes their relative want to come to Sg to visit, you have to play host, prepare their stay and food etc..

 

Big day like CNY, school holiday have to go back to her home town to visit etc...many more..

 

So don't think getting a foreign wife is better, like what I have mentioned above, you have to be mentally prepared.

[Limhm]

Before marriage, wife can promise anything...but aft marriage, she said die die hav to settle/retire in China, wat will u do? N ur kiddo might be abt 18 to 20yrs old niah...

 

Sometimes it's not the economy option, it's e wife option to leave sg...U had to choose between wife n children...Wife said at tt time, children quite independent liao...can stay in sg but wan u go china to retire wif her...then how?

[Hao80]

If thats the case, she can go on her own. But I will join her at a later time until the kids are FINALLY settle their future (study loans/marriage/flat). Even your kid reach adult hood still need some kind of support. Look at todays' flat price, you will know what I mean. I can't imagine how our next generation can survive.

 

As couples, should have some room for negotiation/ give and take ba. If she die die this, die die that then only yourself to blame for not making a better choice. Keke

[Limhm]

Ya...my bro actually faced some such probs too...His wife is an indonesian but she's here since 8 yrs old...now oredi a Singaporean..

 

Problem is tt his inlaws r now staying wif him n they mentioned tt they will wan to retire in my bro's house...They r NOT so easy going pp...n they even hint clearly tt my bro's house, half of it is paid by their daughter..so they have their rights to stay...n they actually had 5 other sons...they r not going to their sons' pl...

 

Another prob is they always hav relatives, siblings even long distant relative staying at my bro's pl...Most r short term...but there's one long distant cousin staying long term...the cousin mentioned tt outside flat rental v ex...dun wan to move out...n my bro's bb coming out at tat time, no room for his bb...OMG...He had a hard time asking him to leave...So now, my bro will refuse any of my sis-in-law's pp to stay at his house.

 

N everytime, when their relative comes over to sg, he had to bring them ard...I felt tt if once a year, it's ok...but many relatives come at different timing...My bro got headache...Tat time, he even had to rent a 7 seater car for tt purpose.