Mazdaowner Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 if bazi say jump down, can I approach HHH? As it is now, I'll even help push!! ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamburger Hypersonic April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 bazi or no bazi, its through the endeavor of both parties,especially men. i seriously wanna to lent you a book on marriage which may take 1/2 hr to read but a lifetime benefiting from it. i bring to you if you are interested.... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 shd be like u har...old fart...canot rem anything.....all is bliss maybe Parkinson's disease is the best form of growing old :D Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiphiphoray 6th Gear April 24, 2012 Author Share April 24, 2012 Do you believe if i tell you most of the govt heads, like CID, Immigration, SCDF, chief police commissioner knows her. You mention her name......they know. Even LKY knows her!!!! That how far she has gone into. All these comes with power, money, high expection. i have gave her ultimatum and told her..........once her work mentality comes into our family! Everything will be over! not going into details, but both have to work and come to a win-win. HHH wife is a hi flyer too, from what I gather, and subconsciously, it may be taking a toll either way. D is a very sad thing, esp when kids involved. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 bro....no need to tell me, i was there before and i know the mindset change and responsibility that comes with it. Really, at her 'superscale' level, it is a diff kettle of fish, I tell you. U hv to really be prepared. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 bro....no need to tell me, i was there before and i know the mindset change and responsibility that comes with it. Really, at her 'superscale' level, it is a diff kettle of fish, I tell you. U hv to really be prepared. and i believe in her mind, she told herself she did it for the family i dun mind change role Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiphiphoray 6th Gear April 24, 2012 Author Share April 24, 2012 (edited) With this i rest my case. Thanks bros for all the advise. Its damn sad to get more reactive response from a public forum than my own wife. i will try out the advises and see how it goes. Hopely it wont end up with the D. Thank you all. i really appreciate it very much. bro....no need to tell me, i was there before and i know the mindset change and responsibility that comes with it. Really, at her 'superscale' level, it is a diff kettle of fish, I tell you. U hv to really be prepared. Edited April 24, 2012 by Hiphiphoray Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solar Turbocharged April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 My wife's bazi is strong right ? Machiam like empress dowager!!! IMHO....she is getting power that she cant control. Strange right.....many people dont mind wify earns more (much more). Duno why i feel the opposite. boh bian loh.. since she was born with power/ability, she got to be able to handle that. i believe u have been supporting her. imo, u can still make it work.. do what u have been doing (but i think the pent-up frustration is blowing up now) have a nice talk when she is calm.. i'm sure she knows herself something has gone wrong. a person at that level would have the ability to analyze. see whether there is something both of u can do.. i'm not sure if suggesting a counsellor is a good idea at this time (as it may sound offensive).. u got to judge the situation so for her hiding things from u... i'm guessing.. u got to see if the things she hide from u are really that important. maybe she thinks its not but u think otherwise. if possible, have a chat.. nicely. sometimes i also hide things i thought kuching kurak from my wife.. and hell broke loose when she found out.. it was serious to her. and people don't mind pay lesser then their other half... yes, it is true.. but an important point is respect. it is not just about earning power..then what about my case.. i earn more than my wife, but somethimes she treats me like sh1t. that's a reverse of your situation back to the same thing.. communication. talk to her. if she shuts herself from listening, try it another time.. but if it consistently that way, perhaps it is time to seek help. no relationship can sustain without communication. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrmilktooth Supercharged April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 how many of us guys will be ok if our missus earns more than us?? is it the asian mindset which means the man must always bring back the bacon?? apparently in today's society, its is definitely not the case... for me, my wife can cook, do hsework and bring back the bacon.. so i sometimes reflect on myself and think im rather small .. like mid life crisis that type.. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mazdaowner Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 how many of us guys will be ok if our missus earns more than us?? is it the asian mindset which means the man must always bring back the bacon?? apparently in today's society, its is definitely not the case... for me, my wife can cook, do hsework and bring back the bacon.. so i sometimes reflect on myself and think im rather small .. like mid life crisis that type.. If my wife earned more then me, I couldn't care less to let such inferiority complex come into my marriage life and family, we work as a team, regardless who makes more who makes less, if wife don't look down on you, why let it bother you in the first place. My wife and myself don't have "Your money, my money" crap. It's all under the same account. It's the TOTAL that matters, to feed the family. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rainbowbiatch 6th Gear April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 If my wife earned more then me, I couldn't care less to let such inferiority complex come into my marriage life and family, we work as a team, regardless who makes more who makes less, if wife don't look down on you, why let it bother you in the first place. My wife and myself don't have "Your money, my money" crap. It's all under the same account. It's the TOTAL that matters, to feed the family. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solar Turbocharged April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 and i believe in her mind, she told herself she did it for the family i dun mind change role sometimes my wife also think laogong is secondary compared to kids and herself.. i guess priorities change as one ages Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solar Turbocharged April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 If my wife earned more then me, I couldn't care less to let such inferiority complex come into my marriage life and family, we work as a team, regardless who makes more who makes less, if wife don't look down on you, why let it bother you in the first place. My wife and myself don't have "Your money, my money" crap. It's all under the same account. It's the TOTAL that matters, to feed the family. agreed. important is respect, who earns more doesn't matter. all $$$ go to the same pot. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 With this i rest my case. Thanks bros for all the advise. Its damn sad to get more reactive response from a public forum than my own wife. i will try out the advises and see how it goes. Hopely it wont end up with the D. Thank you all. i really appreciate it very much. honestly if i am the wife i would be very sad (although i may not be thinking straight as i am too busy with work).... can you imagine the pressure that she is going through at work?? i dun think many man can even handle that (i ran away from it already!) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 honestly if i am the wife i would be very sad (although i may not be thinking straight as i am too busy with work).... can you imagine the pressure that she is going through at work?? i dun think many man can even handle that (i ran away from it already!) ran? wife or work? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mazdaowner Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 agreed. important is respect, who earns more doesn't matter. all $$$ go to the same pot. A lot of couples don't do that. Wife earns, she keeps, husband earns, he keeps, worse is, no one knows who earns how much. He pays for this only, she pays for that only. Why does it have to come to such as husband and wife, being so damn calculative? And this is also one of the mainstream problems that start fights. MONEY! Your MONEY, MY MONEY. But anyone spared a though? WHOSE KIDS WHOSE FAMILY?? yeah...OURS. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solar Turbocharged April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 not going into details, but both have to work and come to a win-win. HHH wife is a hi flyer too, from what I gather, and subconsciously, it may be taking a toll either way. D is a very sad thing, esp when kids involved. couple of years back.. i landed myself in a role that is so damn demanding that i got to work at 15-18hrs everyday, kenna fcuk by client almost daily, and lousy subordinates and partners, in addition, got to be 24x7 contactable. it took a toll on my health and family relationship. my temper became short, my wife cannot tahan my absence (reach home after bath KO leow.. where got the energy to even talk) yes.. D word came out many times..and i even suspected i got some heart-related issue then i realized that cannot go on.., so, i requested for a transfer and luckily, managed to get out of that role. now, life is better.. u can see from the number of posts i put here in mcf compared to about 2yrs ago so.. hhh's wife may also need to reflect upon her priorities too.. this thing got to be mutual. she got to see if her high-flying career is affecting her family, friends or even her health. if she decides to continue, it is her own decision which she will need to know how to handle that. but apparently bro hhh's needs have been compromised. she got to (or made to) realize this somehow.. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator April 24, 2012 Share April 24, 2012 couple of years back.. i landed myself in a role that is so damn demanding that i got to work at 15-18hrs everyday, kenna fcuk by client almost daily, and lousy subordinates and partners, in addition, got to be 24x7 contactable. it took a toll on my health and family relationship. my temper became short, my wife cannot tahan my absence (reach home after bath KO leow.. where got the energy to even talk) yes.. D word came out many times..and i even suspected i got some heart-related issue then i realized that cannot go on.., so, i requested for a transfer and luckily, managed to get out of that role. now, life is better.. u can see from the number of posts i put here in mcf compared to about 2yrs ago so.. hhh's wife may also need to reflect upon her priorities too.. this thing got to be mutual. she got to see if her high-flying career is affecting her family, friends or even her health. if she decides to continue, it is her own decision which she will need to know how to handle that. but apparently bro hhh's needs have been compromised. she got to (or made to) realize this somehow.. yeah bro....many times we realise it too late. And at the end of the day, the family matters. Hope HHH wife realise sooner than later. Power does not last forever. Your family will! ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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