Career dilemma (Advice please)

[Albeniz]

I am at a career cross-road junction.

 

It was not easy finding a job here. My wife and I have the same problem and we have been into a career-drought over the last few months. Ironically, it might be because of our over-qualifications. I sent out a lot of applications but hardly received any reply.

 

Fortunately, I received a telephone call this morning. The HR from a local polytechnic told me that I have passed the 2 rounds of interviews, and made an offer to me over the phone. I am supposed to give them a reply by tomorrow morning (is this too short)?

 

Meanwhile, my newly-wed wife received an offer from a semi-con company at California (also Today).

 

Over the last 2 years, she was alone at Texas and I quited my job some time back to go over as she needed some help. I had difficulty in getting a job in Texas then as many companies were freezing headcount (due to poor US economy outlook).

 

She decided to return as being alone there wasn't easy for her. When she returned, she couldn't find a job here. Out of her job applications, one company from US was among the first few to reply. Today, she received an offer from California.

 

Each of us knew that we are going to stay in the next job for at least 3 years. That means we are going to stay apart for another 3 years. We have already been separated in the last 2 years as she was in Texas and I am in Singapore. That would make a total separation of 5 years for a newly-wed couple.

 

What are your views? Has anyone been in this situation before?

Edited June 4, 2008 by Albeniz

[Jonbummer]

seems like a tough one, bro.

no such experience before...

 

but if your wage from the new work here is good enuff

for your wife not to work for awhile longer, then she

can continue to find work here.

to me, that will be ideal.

 

otherwise, it will be you going over to the states and try

to get a job there.

as u mentioned, i do agree to be apart for so long after

being just married is not the best situation for the both of u.

 

always choose the lesser of 2 evils.

 

hope this will turn out well. as potentially this is a 'good'

situation, for suddenly both managed to get a position.

only now, is wat to do abt it.

 

cheers

[KapitanE]

With you working in local polytechnic, your salary will definitely be able to support your lifestyle without your wife working.

 

If both wants to stay, then you work she become tai tai until she find a job locally. Otherwise, both move and you become house husband until you find a job, while she gives your pocket money.

 

Believe this is not a career question, rather how you want to live your life with your wife.

[Kianbeng]

Hi Bro,

 

I'm afraid I don't have any solid advise for your case. It's a real dilemma. But I have a question for you. Is there any chance you can scale down on your expenses and just rely on single income? ie, your wife stays with you in SG while you work or you join your wife in US.

 

To me, it's a bit weird if I'm living off my wife if I were to join her in US and be a bummer. But whats the greater opportunity cost? You lose your job or she loses hers?

 

If her opportunity cost is greater (considering job, family, misc), then it might make sense for you to join her if you don't want to be apart again. But I can imagine how stressful it will be if you join her in US but kept on being unsuccessful in job hunt.

 

You'll also need to consider when you want to settle down and start the family....

[Wreckwrx]

U got to discuss this with your wife and think long term. Ulitmately, it all boils down to what you wish to achieve as a married couple. For example both can ask each other whether you intend to have kids and by when (bearing in mind the biological clock ticking away).

 

Or do the both of you just want to concentrate on advancing each other's career?

 

As with each decision, both of you must be prepared to live with the consequences.

 

I know this is not much of an advice but I am just sharing with you my thoughts.

[Stary]

Bro, bad idea to separate from your wife for so long for a newly wed. If want to be like that, might as well don't get married.

 

So I guess you should do whatever it takes to avoid that first.

 

I don't see a problem your wife can't get a job in Singapore.

 

I don't even consider your problem a dilemma, unless you have issues that you didn't mention.

 

You already have a job, just survive on that first until your wife get a job in Singapore. Unless both of u have 0 savings than i dunno what to say.

Edited June 4, 2008 by Starry

[Metalslug]

how is this possible in the first place? when wan to get married should commit mah. someone has to sacrifice, else my opinion is, one should learn to let go.

 

both parties have a right to happiness, including yourself

[Apollo]

teaching career in poly sucks... u hv to know tat. it's no swan song.

 

i knw some1 who took 3 months and gone. some1 else has been working much longer and care less... care too much her car got scratched...

obviously students r difficult to control and no saints.

 

anyway...

 

问人答人， 没有人问，还可以问神

 

today 1st day, got temple draw lots...

[Albeniz]

The opportunity cost for her to stay in Sg might be higher.

Her pay at California is US$100k per annum before tax. My pay in Sg is hardly that amount.

 

She was also thinking that both of us could go to a Taiwanese semicon company together as a manager had asked for my resume (through her) this morning.

 

However, I need to reply the polytechnic HR by tomorrow.

I might be running out of time for a decision.

[Wreckwrx]

Bro, although the title of your thread is asking for career guidance, but from the majority of the responses here, it seems like the fellow forummers (incl myself) is more keen on giving you marriage counseling.

 

Surely you can take this as a sign......

[Wreckwrx]

Honestly, you will find yourself getting very disgruntled very quickly when you take on the poly job. On top of your regular lecturing duties, there are tons of other side projects that you must run and a lot of it are due to the whims and fancies of various govt ministers.....

 

If your boss is very eager to climb and gain points, he/she will take on such projects with fury to show off her "capacity".... Guess who will have to slog?

[Yaloryalor]

I think TI is the only Semicon company still building fab in Texas. Most of them are expanding out of US liao..

[Albeniz]

Career-wise, would my path be further narrowed if I take on the poly post?

 

Where can I go after the contract ends?

Edited June 4, 2008 by Albeniz

[Metalslug]

then 100k settles. u be the house husband, hire a maid clean e house. all u do is play playstation, look after the dog, and when time is up meet her for dinner

[Mivec9]

it depends on ur risk taking....

 

If i'm u, probably i keep on trying get another job in California while wifey accept the job. At same time take poly job.

 

If u r those lower risk type...everyone stay put here then. So ur wife try finding here again What's her background like? probably from there, can recommend more things.

[KapitanE]

100k after taxes will be about 60k.....

 

well, .....

[Albeniz]

then 100k settles. u be the house husband, hire a maid clean e house. all u do is play playstation, look after the dog, and when time is up meet her for dinner Wink

 

But tax rate at California can be quite high (I believe it is 30%-35%, correct me if I am wrong). Living expenses is not cheap there either. She may not be able to keep the job there for a very long term. In US, when the company is not performing, retrenchment is common.

[Apollo]

no lah.. this one is TSMC plant in california

 

there's lotsa Fab still around.