Should men be the sole $$ contributor despite both working?

[Icebrush79]

Of course I still love my wife.

 

Bro, out of curiosity and sorry if it is personal, why do you love her?

 

I guess there are other ways she contributes to the marriage?  else, It looks to me that the relationship is one sided, don't you feel unappreciated?  

[Tianmo]

She dont read MCF. But she knows lah. I told her many many times liao.

 

1. Yup, 1k more.

2. Initially not like that one. 4-5 years ago then started.

 

 

Last week, we celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary.

 

 

have you ever wonder why the sudden change???................seriously I cannot imagine tabao food also need to pay back to the last cent...........mayb I cannot understand because never happen to me...............and I sure hope it wont happen to me man...............

 

but then again.........in a relationship .............is 周瑜打黄盖.............you happy can liao............

[Adrianli]

 

Bro, out of curiosity and sorry if it is personal, why do you love her?

 

I guess there are other ways she contributes to the marriage?  else, It looks to me that the relationship is one sided, don't you feel unappreciated?  

 

 

Probably due to so long together already. Just walk together till death do us part.

 

I am thinking of adopting a kid but yet to discuss with her. I hope she can stay home and look after the kid. Then I dont mind paying for everything. She be a homemaker better. But she dont like stay at home. She is on contract job, even no job, she is out meeting her frens.

[Jman888]

 

Bro, out of curiosity and sorry if it is personal, why do you love her?

 

I guess there are other ways she contributes to the marriage?  else, It looks to me that the relationship is one sided, don't you feel unappreciated?  

 

 

 

if you see his room full of RC toys, you will understand, i doubt my wife will let me do that    

[Adrianli]

have you ever wonder why the sudden change???................seriously I cannot imagine tabao food also need to pay back to the last cent...........mayb I cannot understand because never happen to me...............and I sure hope it wont happen to me man...............

 

but then again.........in a relationship .............is 周瑜打黄盖.............you happy can liao............

 

I guess it started when she start owing CC bills and not let me know. When it was 6k, I gave her 3k to help clear her bills. But she still spending like nobody's business. Then I dont want to help her pay already. She see I not helping her, she not happy. But hello, I help u once and you still continue, who will help again.

 

She will not listen to me to spend less and save money. I give up.

[Evillusion]

For real. I am the living example. As my fren told me, all my wife need to do is live and breath only.

 

All bills, home, car, furniture, appliances, etc.... I pay. Recently she wana buy steamer, say wana cook for me and use our joint account to pay for it. Only I am contributing to the joint account lor. She raiding my reserve.

 

 

She say her money is to maintain herself. Got hair lah, make-up lah, dresses lah, shoes lah, facial lah, etc.... to pay. And she still owe CC almost $10k. Expect me to clear for her. I said no, I have no debts, only car loan. Always going for buffet with her frens, eat until so fat. Then wana join gym to slim down. Now gym also close down. Want me sponser her go another gym, I told her no money.

 

 

Wana have kids but she say dont want. I want, I have to pay everything for the kid even for IVF and all the food + stuff. I heard liao sian. Went thru 3 times IVF, all I paid partial from only my medisave. She say use only my medisave cos its I want the kid, not her. She dont want kids. Lucky all 3 IVF unsuccessful.

 

I think she is a parasite to suck me dry dry.

No wonder you like to play with toy helicopter...

[Adrianli]

if you see his room full of RC toys, you will understand, i doubt my wife will let me do that    

 

The collection is over the years hor. I just divert my energy to something I like.

[Kusje]

Probably due to so long together already. Just walk together till death do us part.

 

I am thinking of adopting a kid but yet to discuss with her. I hope she can stay home and look after the kid. Then I dont mind paying for everything. She be a homemaker better. But she dont like stay at home. She is on contract job, even no job, she is out meeting her frens.

 

Don't do it la. It will just harm the kid. Anything happen to you, the kid will suffer even more.

 

You sure you didn't get caught eating outside 4-5 years back? At work now, will try to write more later.

[G1234]

Don't do it la. It will just harm the kid. Anything happen to you, the kid will suffer even more.

 

You sure you didn't get caught eating outside 4-5 years back? At work now, will try to write more later.

 

men's talk..... 

[Evillusion]

Don't do it la. It will just harm the kid. Anything happen to you, the kid will suffer even more.

 

You sure you didn't get caught eating outside 4-5 years back? At work now, will try to write more later.

If wan can adopt me......

[Tianmo]

I guess it started when she start owing CC bills and not let me know. When it was 6k, I gave her 3k to help clear her bills. But she still spending like nobody's business. Then I dont want to help her pay already. She see I not helping her, she not happy. But hello, I help u once and you still continue, who will help again.

 

She will not listen to me to spend less and save money. I give up.

 

not healthy bro...........this is all I can say...........  

[Adrianli]

Don't do it la. It will just harm the kid. Anything happen to you, the kid will suffer even more.

 

You sure you didn't get caught eating outside 4-5 years back? At work now, will try to write more later.

 

Eversince I married, never eat out hor. Nothing to get caught. Only always early morning on weekends go out play r/c at illegal sites and get caught by the authorities.

[Piyopico]

I guess it started when she start owing CC bills and not let me know. When it was 6k, I gave her 3k to help clear her bills. But she still spending like nobody's business. Then I dont want to help her pay already. She see I not helping her, she not happy. But hello, I help u once and you still continue, who will help again.

 

She will not listen to me to spend less and save money. I give up.

I suggest both of you go for counselling

 

If you love her, you gotto get help for her. Matters will escalate beyond your control if you dun do it fast.

[Adrianli]

not healthy bro...........this is all I can say...........  

 

I already told her, if she get sue by the bank, her business. I not going to bail her out and dont ever think of selling our flat cos 80% of the flat is paid by me!!!

[Adrianli]

I suggest both of you go for counselling

 

If you love her, you gotto get help for her. Matters will escalate beyond your control if you dun do it fast.

 

I have asked her go for financial counselling but she dont want. Its like asking a smoker to quit smoking. Only he/she can help him/her self.

 

Once I told her I will cut up all her CC, she say she will divorce me and take 50% of my asserts and make me pay her alimony.

Edited November 28, 2016 by Adrianli

[SuPerBoRed]

Yup, and i'm really thankful I brought this up before marriage because I felt this is essential. 

 

things can change alot over the course of a marriage ..   shld have discussions and new agreements if ever the need arises 

[Kusje]

I already told her, if she get sue by the bank, her business. I not going to bail her out and dont ever think of selling our flat cos 80% of the flat is paid by me!!!

 

Under her name leh.

 

Even if it is 100% paid by you, I think the creditors can go after it.

[Atrecord]

I already told her, if she get sue by the bank, her business. I not going to bail her out and dont ever think of selling our flat cos 80% of the flat is paid by me!!!

 

Err... dangerous leh like this...

 

I suggest you tip off the banks to cancel her cc first till her debt is fully settled. Else it snowballs and you don't help, then it will soon become cannot settle liao, and then kanna worse like sued to bankruptcy how? 

 

Must put a stop to the situation one way or another lah...