Darthrevan Supercharged July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 i know.. she is in most difficult position.. not me.. that's why i have some talk this few day with her.. i will not stop her from letting them stay for that few month... but is only matter of time before i explode if their attitude remained.... before u marry her, u already know abt the family situation right? i feel its a case of different expectations, so u have to work to change her mindset..else ur marriage will be a world of hurt. ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ahseng 5th Gear July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 (edited) before marriage surely u know abt the sh*t already wat. Not prepared for it then either say out b4 marriage or accept your fate. but my opinion is those bros who have already had jobs don't really deserve much help. wtf handfone bill also can't afford to pay then pls juz go home sleep(its free). Oh yea, and if your wife is NOT ON YOUR SIDE, Its The End. Edited July 19, 2010 by Ahseng Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Galantspeedz Turbocharged July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 Sorry you marry her only and not the family. The man and woman when married leaves their parents and become one. Our Parents, Brothers, Sisters... ALL in the Outer Circle. Joemit, you should tell your wife that she has to make a Stand as to How Much of her income can be used to support her family - Give it to her Parents and let them Redistribute to her Bros, and Sis. About them staying in your house.... Note - your house is NOT a Hotel. If they chose to work in SG, they have to find a rental house. ONLY her Parents can stay in your house. Handphone bills - why you so generous ? cut all of it and make them pay by themselves. Sometimes, you have to be the HEAD of your Household. Don't let these Pariahs sh1t all over your home. sorry too... that is your thinking.. not everyone's... different people has different opinions and they were also brought up with different morals... no right or wrong.. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ah_tee 2nd Gear July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 bro i be a crude to you i think after what they are able to do to you, i feel u r too nice a guy lay down the rules and play hardball i disagree with when u marry her u marry the family. the only responsiblities u have is to take care of ur wife. if her parents or siblings come visit, its ok to stay, but not until ur hse become hotel or they freeload on you. play a hospitable host and thats all, unless they are deserving pple, then its up to u whether u want to go the extra mile. why open a line for them under ur name ? my advice to u ? play hardball now, enough is enough, u come to visit, few days stay if here to work, please settle ur own lodging. the wife part you need to have a good talk with her. she should know more or less how "chow kuan" her family is Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zniper 2nd Gear July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 to TS, ask the 1st bro to F off lah... only 1yr difference, he handicap or wat??? as a man he cant even take care of himself dan i really will feel sorry for his future gf/wife... if for me, i sure F the whole family upside down and tell them the rationale of telling them off.... if they still dun noe how to tink dan all i can say is whole family no hope liao (except ur wife)... feel really sad for them not u... haha Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billyone Neutral Newbie July 19, 2010 Share July 19, 2010 A Baby mosquito came back after the 1st flight.His dad asked him "How do you feel?"... He replied "It was wonderful, Everyone was clapping for me!" Now thats what I call Positive Attitude.. Life is as we think, so think beautifully...have a beautiful day! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheesepiekia 5th Gear July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 Get your wife to disown her family. If she don't, get rid of her. Otherwise you might not have money to even feed yourself. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 no lah.. i not asking for advise actually i just want to let go my streammzzzzz... cos have been inside me for 1 years... i feel better at least someone heard me out.. i can't talk much to my family cos i dun want them to worry too much.. Good that you aired this out so you can seek some form of support here...but this is not the long term solution. If you keep swallowing and tahan-ing all these, one day you gonna be the next reason why the MRT stall for 2hrs [:p] Take it easy and find a more permanent solution Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 no lah.. i not asking for advise actually i just want to let go my streammzzzzz... cos have been inside me for 1 years... i feel better at least someone heard me out.. i can't talk much to my family cos i dun want them to worry too much.. this is "My Counseling Forum", a lot of Auntie Agony will will listen to your problem.... but the action depends on you, good luck, i guest it is a life/death situation as i see you can still take it with a smile Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleepy-T 1st Gear July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 honestly.. it impossible for me to talk to her family.. cause her family is very extreme.. she told me before.. they will prefer her not to get married and take care of her..rather than she married and give up on them... Hi Bro, sorry how old is her sibling, dun they contribute to their family also? why her parents insist on ur wife to take care of them? isn't the older Male child is supposed to take take of all the sibling? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 this is "My Counseling Forum", a lot of Auntie Agony will will listen to your problem.... but the action depends on you, good luck, i guest it is a life/death situation as i see you can still take it with a smile if anyone listens to the advise here.....my business sure go up [:p] [:p] Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curahee 1st Gear July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 Although my case not as serious as TS, but still feeling fed up, my wife last time live with her bro, sis and my in law. Despite now my wife already move out to stay with me, she still need to pay for their family car season parking, SCV, internet, pub bill, always ask her to buy stuffs back and nv return money etc. However her sis and bro already working.... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thargor 1st Gear July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 I knw my wife are in most diffiult position that the reason i allow them to stay for time being.. But.. i only request for some repect and resposible from her family.. How long can this last...... I don't suppose you have a kid yet.... You really need to trash this out with your wife...now no kid still 'okay' i guess but once the kid comes, your wife has to know where her priorities are. Especially when it comes to money, always make sure there is a pool of money that she cannot touch or use for her family. This pool of money is for you, your wife and your future kid ONLY. People will tell you....love will conquer everything...ya right...before marriage. After marriage...these are the things that will break down a marriage. Have a good chat with your wife and let her know what is your threshold. This problem WILL NOT GO away. Don't let it drag till your kid comes along. People who tell you..."You know the problems before you marry your wife right" are just talking rubbish...they are NOT YOU....you are the one going through it all. Sometimes you need to make a stand that ENOUGH IS ENOUGH...BEYOND THAT...YOU WILL JUST WALK AWAY. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tigerwoods Turbocharged July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 sorry too... that is your thinking.. not everyone's... different people has different opinions and they were also brought up with different morals... no right or wrong.. So if the Man's family also decided to stay in his house will the Wife be very understanding too ? The issue is not about my thinking. It is how they make a stand to their own privacy. So the wife Bros and Sis morals are correct and this poor guy and wife need to live with it ? Will you do the same as TS ?? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thargor 1st Gear July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 So if the Man's family also decided to stay in his house will the Wife be very understanding too ? The issue is not about my thinking. It is how they make a stand to their own privacy. So the wife Bros and Sis morals are correct and this poor guy and wife need to live with it ? Will you do the same as TS ?? When the needle is not pricking on one's fresh, one will not feel the pain. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 So if the Man's family also decided to stay in his house will the Wife be very understanding too ? The issue is not about my thinking. It is how they make a stand to their own privacy. So the wife Bros and Sis morals are correct and this poor guy and wife need to live with it ? Will you do the same as TS ?? when you post these questions, the answer can be yes or no, that is why there will never be a right or wrong, correct or incorrect, moral or immoral! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mockngbrd Supersonic July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 it really is how you want the remaining of your life to go dude... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singer_high Neutral Newbie July 20, 2010 Share July 20, 2010 (edited) Short term solution: - Get your own parents to move in temporary. - Rent out room, so no more space for freeloaders. - Rent out your whole house, go live with your parents. Long term solution: - Move far far away from MY & SG. Australia might be too near, they can still take budget airline. Maybe NZ or Canada? Edited July 20, 2010 by Singer_high ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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