End the marriage, save the relationship (NOC - Ryan & Sylvia)

[Fitvip]

15 hours ago, SiLangKia said:

Still trying to find an orphan as a gf, no luck, all the attractive ppl I know have tiger moms, I think I'll just die alone 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Learn to tame the tiger and the rest will fall in place!🤣 May consult Jamesc!🤣

[Mockngbrd]

5 minutes ago, Fitvip said:

Learn to tame the tiger and the rest will fall in place!🤣 May consult Jamesc!🤣

 

[Fitvip]

I read about an artiste who threw a dinner to celebrate his divorce many years ago. Happy ending? Only they know.

I don't really buy their story. Notice Ryan wept several times. It is sad. There must be something deeper that that...

[Spring]

The difference between marriage of today vs marriage during our parents/grandparents time is clear segregation of responsibilities. Men go out to bring home the bacon whilst women ensure a stable home, take care of kids, wash and cook in days gone by.

I know there will be feminists who will want to lynch me in today's era of equality but I'm not a male chauvinist. Point I'm trying to put across was that things were much simpler then with primary focus on main responsibility.

One party goes out to earn $ knowing that all at home is in good hands instead of worrying whether the maid is skiving, bullying the kids etc. Whilst the other can focus on family instead of worrying whether boss, colleagues will make noise if home is the priority, not doing enough of their share of work etc. Multi-tasking is nvr easy and tensions arises when a person can't cope n more often than not, this spills over to the partner and with it the family as well. A pressurised environment is not good for relationships n leads to short fuse, impatience and high demands.

Bygone days women depend on their husbands for $ whilst men depend on their wives for support. There was no such things as maids, parents hardly help cos they got too many children and this drives couples to want to make it work compared to today where there are alternatives so the motivation to work on marriages are not as strong. Also whilst temptations do exist in old days, they are more so today. It takes a strong will to say no esp when there is unhappiness in a relationship.

 

[Watwheels]

36 minutes ago, Mcscot said:

I think it takes a brave couple to be talking about this on social media especially in our conservative society but maybe this is the future where we live our lives online.

To be fair ... I think the poor chap still very much in love but there is a song - "if you really love her, you have to set her her free!" (Rick Price ... damn old song!).

 

I'm not an RS expert but I have seen such an example before.

We were in Sec School and the couple started the RS at a young age, got married and end up in divorce. Back then I actually saw that the girl wasnt happy. I didnt know them that well so I didnt say anything. It was very one sided. The guy has the RS and marriage thing all worked out in his mind but one thing he didnt do is ask the girl whether that's what she wants as well. In the end I think he's the one who got hurt.

To many factors to mention. For some it takes them longer to mature and know what they want in a RS. Some takes a few tries to know. So there's no right or wrong like some ppl imagined. It's just...complicated. LoL...

Some ppl will think they failed as a couple. I think it's ok to fail in a RS. There's no book or model answer to make RS work and be happy.

[Jman888]

in current era, everything have to be fast, including relationships, it has to click the right soulmate to last forever, but that is like 1in a million chance. If not just end it (throw away) and move on the next one, just like jobs, dresses, phones, too many to choose from.

who will spend 10 years to really know the person you married, then another 10 years to learn how to love that person wholeheartedly?? 

 

[BanCoe]

Old days cars can last looooooong time beyond even 50 years ...... Everything can be fixed ( give n take and lower expectations of each other’s and you will get life mileage n respect ) 

 now only 10 years ....... Ban COe’s !!! 

Edited June 1, 2020 by BanCoe

[Throttle2]

18 hours ago, BabyBlade said:

I'm not sure how many people here know Ryan & Sylvia from Night Owl Cinematics but I thought this was a meaningful and touching video to share. This is not about NOC but rather how a long time couple eventually came to a realisation that after 10 years of being together it's time to let go and eventually cope with their divorce. 

To those who are struggling in a relationship or marriage right now, at some point you'll have to realise that some people can stay in your heart, but not your life. And letting go will probably do the both of you more good than holding on. 

XOXO. 

Classic Mistakes made in a marriage will break it.  In this case all the mistakes were made together.  This is not to say that there is a fault on each party. But its good that this young couple can understand and move on.

Classic mistakes below:

1. Marry too young (not talking about age per se but life experiences although there is a big connection) Too dreamy and not feet on ground. Goals and characters still in the clouds.

2. Working in the same company on par level with your spouse. This takes the boardroom to the bedroom. No No.  It’s even better if in a totally different industry.

3. Not having any children within 10 yrs of marriage. If no children, marry for f**k? Literally 😄. Those who think they can hv a dog or cat as a pet “child “ please grow up!  It is children who enrich a marriage.  Having children is the one true life project for partners.  If dont want children, please dont bother getting married and being legally bound. Stupid!  

the above are top 3 classic mistakes.

please dont include infidelity etc.... those kind are not mistakes, they are cheating... muayhahaha

 

While it doesnt mean that one cannot have a blissful marriage while still committing above classic mistakes, but it does mean a lower probability of success and a higher probability of divorce.

 

[Mockngbrd]

1 hour ago, Fitvip said:

I read about an artiste who threw a dinner to celebrate his divorce many years ago. Happy ending? Only they know.

I don't really buy their story. Notice Ryan wept several times. It is sad. There must be something deeper that that...

Aiya ok one. Man still got chan. 

[Discoburg]

Saw the video last night and all I think it's crappy. The video is made to let their clients think and know that not will still go on. Not married but still very good 'working' partners like before. Initially I really have no idea as to what is the point of doing a YouTube video on informing everyone that they are separated and headed to a divorce.

By the way I feel that the lady is very 'strong' and not sad about the divorce, just my 2 cents.

[Throttle2]

1 minute ago, Discoburg said:

Saw the video last night and all I think it's crappy. The video is made to let their clients think and know that not will still go on. Not married but still very good 'working' partners like before. Initially I really have no idea as to what is the point of doing a YouTube video on informing everyone that they are separated and headed to a divorce.

By the way I feel that the lady is very 'strong' and not sad about the divorce, just my 2 cents.

Its clear who is the more emotionally sensitive one, even XiKway Ong admitted he is. 

Crying is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of Heart.

and its very normal when 2 lovers part in an amicable way.

i see it with no ill intentions., the video. They need to get it off their chests and its a fair way of doing it, especially since that is their profession.

i would wish this pair goodness and success going forward

[Mockngbrd]

Hard DARE YOU be rational! THIS IS INTERNET!

[Discoburg]

36 minutes ago, Throttle2 said:

Its clear who is the more emotionally sensitive one, even XiKway Ong admitted he is. 

Crying is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of Heart.

and its very normal when 2 lovers part in an amicable way.

i see it with no ill intentions., the video. They need to get it off their chests and its a fair way of doing it, especially since that is their profession.

i would wish this pair goodness and success going forward

I think everyone can tell the guy is the sensitive one. No one will watch with ill intentions but may develop some after watching the video. 

[boonhat_91]

4 hours ago, Rickster said:

 

I'm more on the camp of what does all the money mean when u have no real family or relationships.

 

Money means everything in $$$INGAPURA 🤑

[Throttle2]

42 minutes ago, Discoburg said:

I think everyone can tell the guy is the sensitive one. No one will watch with ill intentions but may develop some after watching the video. 

Nottalking about people watching with ill intentions .

i mean they make the video with no ill intentions and its meaningful as they also need to address their team which is like family to them.

[Spring]

2 hours ago, Throttle2 said:

Classic Mistakes made in a marriage will break it.  In this case all the mistakes were made together.  This is not to say that there is a fault on each party. But its good that this young couple can understand and move on.

Classic mistakes below:

1. Marry too young (not talking about age per se but life experiences although there is a big connection) Too dreamy and not feet on ground. Goals and characters still in the clouds.

2. Working in the same company on par level with your spouse. This takes the boardroom to the bedroom. No No.  It’s even better if in a totally different industry.

3. Not having any children within 10 yrs of marriage. If no children, marry for f**k? Literally 😄. Those who think they can hv a dog or cat as a pet “child “ please grow up!  It is children who enrich a marriage.  Having children is the one true life project for partners.  If dont want children, please dont bother getting married and being legally bound. Stupid!  

the above are top 3 classic mistakes.

please dont include infidelity etc.... those kind are not mistakes, they are cheating... muayhahaha

 

While it doesnt mean that one cannot have a blissful marriage while still committing above classic mistakes, but it does mean a lower probability of success and a higher probability of divorce.

 

Wha for once I see u post seriously Great sharing!

When T2 posts serious stuff, think all of us better wake up

[Wt_know]

4 minutes ago, Spring said:

Wha for once I see u post seriously Great sharing!

When T2 posts serious stuff, think all of us better wake up

yeah ... better than calling 1800-help-line for advice ... lol

[Throttle2]

9 minutes ago, Spring said:

Wha for once I see u post seriously Great sharing!

When T2 posts serious stuff, think all of us better wake up

For once meh? Zhun boh?

 

muayhahhahahah